Had court yesterday. Missed work. They reset court for 2 weeks. Will have to miss work again. Have drug class today at noon. Ill have it every tuesday. I went to work was going to leave for 2 hours to do the class, the owners son was there he was all pissed off he said you may as well just leave since you are going to leave anyway. My mom got an apartment for me in her name so i could move out of this motel. So i move in there on thursday. But i have to pay all my money then come up with a thousand dollars by the first. Which is hard bc i keep getting pulled away from work. It feels like my job is in jeopardy now… im stressed the hell out and i cant stop ruminating thoughts about what will happen. The old aa saying one day at a time is helping alot, even though a drink is the last thing on my mind. Vent complete
Maybe you coukd find a new job thru the program that would be more understanding of your situation and cause less grief.you dont need that kind of stress on top of what you have already. Good luck, man.
Have you considered going out on disability to seek treatment? I used that the first time I went to rehab. Maybe a conversation worth having with your doctor and employer.
You didn’t pick up a drink or drug right? You made the class, sure it isn’t a meeting but it is better than nothing. Guess what for an alcoholic/addict that is a pretty damn good day!
You cannot control your boss or what happens with your job. Take care of your obligations and work your ass off when you are at work. That’s all you can do right now. Things will work themselves out the way they should as long as you put your sobriety fist, second, and third in your life.
No drug or drink. Quite a few more cigarettes. I went to the class i requested the one on one drug class with a counselor. We clicked immediately. i told her how stressed out i was about this. She told me a few stories that changed my perspective a bit. One story she told me is about the first 15 years she was driving she was terrified to drive over bridges… so she would literally get to a bridge park the car, walk across the bridge look around on the other side, walk back and then get in her car and drive across it. I was confused i was like well what was all that for? She said she was afraid of what was on the other side of the bridge. Still confused i let her continue. She said one day she was driving and her dad was with her, and they approached a bridge and she did her usual routine walked across checked it out and walked back got in the car. Her dad said “rose mary how long that take you to walk cross that bridge” (her impression of him was hilarious) she said i dont know daddy maybe 2 mins. And he said “whyd you go an do that” she told him she was afraid of what was on the other side. He replied “so you mean to tell me in that 2 minutes that you was walkin back you dont think something on the other side of that bridge has changed? A deer might be sitting in the middle of the road right now, you cant change things like that so dont try to control them or youll drive yoself crazy. Youve got to have faith that everything happens for a reason and quit overthinking things, and worrying about things that havnt happened yet, because if they do happen well then now you have to worry twice aint ya? Now go on to the store so i can get my lucky strikes.”
He was just in a bad mood that morning, he apologized later on and said ill never have to worry about being let go or anything. Sort of glad i had the whole day off anyway
Hi @Sean2 just reading your thread and am relieved that your boss is ok…I was going to suggest being up front with your boss and explain where you are at… but if they know that is good… keep them in the picture as to your recovery commitments so they know when you will be off work… that is all you can do… plus keep working hard and being conscientious… recovery comes first… well done for staying sober… your attitude sounds great
That is stressful bud - Papers/ life and all that go with it are not Easy. The thing I always told myself after I got locked away with no key; I was not a grateful person. Good luck.