Thank you Jane.c 
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Youâve got this! Weâre all here to support you and encourage you along the way! Come here any time you have a craving or urge to drink and we can help you through it 
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Well, look at you Paul⌠thatâs some good advice right there. 
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Itâs not all your fault. Thereâs a lot of brain chemistry at play here. Your best betâif you really do want to stay sober, is to attend some local/online AA meetings. Iâd also recommend posting on here daily. Awesome job reaching out to this community! Be sure to come back
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Thank you im finding this very helpful
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i remember when I first stumbled upon this. It felt like a secret weapon in my pocket. If youâre in a tight spot you can always ârun to the bathroomâ and talk to us about it 
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I like to think of the saying âIf you do what you always did youâll get what you always gotâ. Iâve tried to quit many times before as well, this time itâs sticking better for me. Im putting more work into my sobriety everyday and it helps. I listen to sobriety podcasts, read recovery books, and come on here a lot. There is hope, if my sorry ass can string a bunch of months together so can you.
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This is the heart of what you need to understand. You are not other people, you are you. You are responsible for yourself, no one else is. You have to live with the consequences of your drinking, no one else does. You can get sober, no one else can do it for you. There is freedom in this thought, try to see it!
I understand that it makes it so much harder the ppl around you whom you love drink and invite you to it. Tell them to stop offering and ask for their support. If they can support you, limit your interactions pre-drinking night somewhat, so that you donât even have to decline the offer, but the offer doesnât even get to you, so to speak. I know itâs hard, but limiting the temptation does really make a big difference. Iâm 11 months sober and still donât want drink in the house, cos it makes it harder.
Another thing youâve already accomplished intellectually it seems is to change your thinking habits somewhat. Your time alone has to become a positive or at least neutral thing for you, not something you dread. You craving to be with your family and join the fun will eventually lead to you doing so and picking up again. The value of your time and activities away from drink must increase for you. You wonât want to stay sober if you associate that with being alone, missing your folks, being left out etc - who would?
For that aspect ALONE it makes sense to go to AA. Youâll learn about sobriety, it actively gives you sth to do and somewhere to be during âthose timesâ, youâll see new things and experience sth new that is only yours (high value!) and most importantly: youâll meet ppl and make connections with them. That I think is the most powerful tool. Youâll be connected to someone else with the same goal, create accountability, maybe hopefully make some friends, just have sth outside your family who are not safe for you to be around at the early stages regarding your sobriety.
Lastly, take the cotton wool outta your ears and put it in your ears, @Allieby! Youâve been trying for years, so what youâre doing is not working. Youâve gotten excellent advise here from ppl whoâve got what you want to have: sobriety. Weâve been there. Do what is suggested to you here, even if you got your prejudices. Everyoneâs got prejudices, itâs human. You donât want to hear about god and youâll be lonely without your folks. Well tough luck, youâll have to hear about god if you want sobriety and youâll have to work to make your alone time agreeable and to become less lonely. If nothing changes, nothing changes! But the good, the best news (for me at least!) is: things can change!
I say all this from a place of love and support for you @Allieby! Iâve been there as have so many on here. We will support you with what we know. Take the suggestions. For yourself! Let us know how itâs going! 
