# Feeling out of it and relapsing
**URL:** https://talkingsober.com/t/feeling-out-of-it-and-relapsing/150917
**Category:** Relapses
**Created:** [September 11, 2022, 12:10am UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/feeling-out-of-it-and-relapsing/150917 "2022-09-11T00:10:43Z")
**Posts on this page:** 7
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@Meganb1997](https://talkingsober.com/u/Meganb1997)
#### Post date: [September 11, 2022, 12:10am UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/feeling-out-of-it-and-relapsing/150917/1 "2022-09-11T00:10:43Z")
I have been trying to get sober for 2 months now. This is my 3rd day one of sobriety. I was 24 hours away from getting my 2 week chip.I failed at that. I am trying to get sober and stay sober. My husband told me yesterday that because of my alcohol use it made him fall out of love with me and he no longer loves me now. I failed at that too. That makes me want to drink even more but I know I have to do this for me. I have to get sober and stay sober. I just don’t know how. And I go through the days not even feeling here. Like alive on this planet. I go through the days feeling completely disconnected from everything. Is this a normal experience to feel completely out of it when you stop drinking?
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### Author:  [@Bears515054](https://talkingsober.com/u/Bears515054)
#### Post date: [September 11, 2022, 12:29am UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/feeling-out-of-it-and-relapsing/150917/4 "2022-09-11T00:29:17Z")
My story and struggle too. Way more Day 1’s, than I want to admit.
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### Author:  [@Lisa07](https://talkingsober.com/u/Lisa07)
#### Post date: [September 11, 2022, 1:25am UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/feeling-out-of-it-and-relapsing/150917/6 "2022-09-11T01:25:56Z")
> [@Meganb1997](#):
>
> I have to get sober and stay sober. I just don’t know how.
I didn’t know how either so I reached out for help. I went to IOP followed by AA and those people showed me what to do. If it weren’t for those caring people giving me what was freely given to them, I would probably be dead by now. It’s a “we” program. By following this simple program, I now have 3 years sober and my life has been completely transformed. By no means is life easy but it’s manageable.
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### Author:  [@Meganb1997](https://talkingsober.com/u/Meganb1997)
#### Post date: [September 12, 2022, 1:51am UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/feeling-out-of-it-and-relapsing/150917/7 "2022-09-12T01:51:17Z")
Thank you everyone for the support! It really helps and helps me feel not so alone.
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### Author:  [@TrustyBird](https://talkingsober.com/u/TrustyBird)
#### Post date: [September 12, 2022, 4:36am UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/feeling-out-of-it-and-relapsing/150917/8 "2022-09-12T04:36:20Z")
You definitely aren’t alone, and you aren’t a failure. You just haven’t figured out how to succeed yet. Read around and reach out when you need support. Welcome!
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### Author:  [@SinceIAwoke](https://talkingsober.com/u/SinceIAwoke)
#### Post date: [September 12, 2022, 9:22am UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/feeling-out-of-it-and-relapsing/150917/9 "2022-09-12T09:22:11Z")
You are motivated, and that’s a big start. Here’s two threads that have plenty of practical ideas. I pray that you find your way in sobriety. 🙏
> [@2 years sober and what helped me to get there](https://talkingsober.com/t/2-years-sober-and-what-helped-me-to-get-there/99392):
>
> 2 days ago I celebrated my 2 years sober again. Again, because years ago I had a long stretch of sober days too but relapsed after 5 years. My doc is alcohol. I started to drink when I was 16 year or so and it increased in my student days. I noticed I had a problem around the aged of 30 I guess. Tried to quit multiple times but couldn’t get more then 30 days sober pensive Decided to give myself an ultimatum: 1 year. 1 year to get sober myself otherwise I would go to see my doctor and ask fo…
> [@Resources for our recovery](https://talkingsober.com/t/resources-for-our-recovery/52812):
>
> There are so many helpful resources available to us on our sober journeys. I wanted to share this list for those who are interested in non traditional resources. Please note: I created this thread with alcohol recovery in mind and it is U.S. based as well. As a straight white past middle age woman (SassyRocks), it is based on what resonated and helped me in my journey. Over time, I have added in resources for some other addictions (found at the end of this post), but it is heavy with resources …
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### Author:  [@Misokatsu](https://talkingsober.com/u/Misokatsu)
#### Post date: [September 12, 2022, 10:00am UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/feeling-out-of-it-and-relapsing/150917/10 "2022-09-12T10:00:17Z")
Welcome and big hugs. I have been in that position. My husband didn’t say the words, but was just coldly distant. He kept my purse and checked on me constantly. I was totally hopeless and sick and tired of being sick and tired. There are some good links above. For me, I did the 30 day Alcohol Experiment
> **[The Alcohol Experiment™ - This Naked Mind](https://thisnakedmind.com/blog-the-alcohol-experiment/)**
>
> In the grand scheme of things it's only 30 days. What about an alcohol experiment? Can you ditch alcohol for 30 days?
You have videos and homework each day to learn about alcohol and what it does. That really taught me a lot. I learnt that I really had to quit entirely. In the end, to do that I needed to community and structure of AA.
My husband and I are still a work in progress, but at least we are equal.