I drank yesterday, 78 days gone. I was not vigilant enough and i allowed my addict brain to get the best of me. I am so sad and mad and defeated. I just came from my therapist, however i do not feel better. My anxiety and depressions back. I have never been so pissed at myself. Things were going so great and i let my guard down and just like that destruction. I am starting over once again but i dobt have the same confidence i once had. I just feel confused and sad. Im going to try an aa meeting tomorrow. Im sorry.
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Iâm sorry man. I sent you a pm.
Hey @Gibb ,I know it doesnât feel like youâll get your confidence back but you will. When I relapsed, I felt defeated and embarrassed. The anger that I had really helped me this time around and made me overcome some triggers that I couldnât before. This relapse is strengthening you for the battle. Youâre here and you were honestâŚthatâs huge and takes a lot of guts. Donât beat yourself upâŚget angry at this disease.
Sidenote: My Grandfather relapsed 3 times before he got itâŚand passed away with 38 years of sobriety.
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I am having a rough time getting over this. Im not trying to beat myself up about this but i cant get over it. Im so upset about this. I thought i had a good understanding of this but instead i let my guard down and here i am. I know the feelings will get better but im feeling defeated and sad.
Weâre here for ya. Just process your feelings and trudge ahead.
Thanks. I am finally able to think about what happened without being furious about it. I let my guard down and was not taking my sobriety as seriously has i had before. I will take this bummer thing and take the lesson from it. Sobriety is so important to me and i will not take it lightly or for granted again. I will succeed. All your guys help is greatly appreciated.
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Iâm glad youâre feeling a little better about things Joe.
These feelings of depression and anxiety will pass once again if you donât keep drinking, you relapsed, now start again, and you will feel start better again. I know, i have been there, only thing to do is to keep pushing, hang in there, you got this 
just have to get through the bad feelings youâre experiencing right now
I am sorry youâre feeling this way 
Try not to be too hard on yourself. Last time I relapsed I was so mad at myself the anxiety made me sick! Keep your chin up, Iâm glad you climbed back on the horse right away
I read this and just thought ânooooooo!â Iâve been reading your posts and following you. Iâm so sorry!
Iâm glad you have support that you can turn to (counseling). Keep posting. Weâre here and youâre in my thoughts!
This is one thing I donât like about counting the days. The person who doesnât drink for 20 years and then in a moment of weakness gets drunk didnât throw those 20 years away in my book. He made a mistake like everyone else in the world. He stayed true to his goals for 20 years and then slipped. But you can always get up after you slip.
Same for you. Those 78 days were hard won. You didnât throw them away. You made a mistake. You know what made you slip this time. Learning from mistakes is human.
You did 78 days onceâI know you can do it again.
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I have to agree with @Hozomeen. I think that counting days is important yes but you donât lose all that hard work with a slip up. We are human and we all make mistakes⌠those 78 count as a whole hell of a lot imo and you shouldnât be so hard on yourself. You picked yourself up right away and got back on track. Forgive yourself for the slip up⌠you know what youâre doing and you got this. I hope I will be able to reach 78 days like you did. I slipped many times during the holidays unfortunately because it was a rough time for me⌠but I too am trying to get back on the horse and am only on day 3. The fact that weâre on this forum is a huge sign of strength and determination. Stay strong friend.
Sorry to hear you had a slip we dont have a mental defence against the first drink , when i used to feel like drinking again in my earlier years in sobriety i lifted the phone phoned my sponsor got to a AA meeting and it passed be safe
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Sure wish I could give you a great big hug JoeâŚ
Just woke up and i am feeling a lot better about my drink the other day. Now that I am not so upset and defeated but am ready to kick this addictions bitch ass. I see it as a good lesson, which will not be repeated. Im a quick learenerđ. Thanks to all for your support on this slip that i never thought would happen. I feel strong and vigilant this morning snd i will not let that erase me.
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There ya go @Gibb âŚget mad like a warrior
You got this!! 
