First Day sober after a 4month relapse

Relapses
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I had done 78 days of cold turkey, I didn’t know this but I was in the middle of the pink cloud, everything felt better, my energy was on 1000%, I was going gym, saving money, got a new job and even change homes due to a toxic/abusive relationship.

My ex contacted me because he knew I was going ok with sobriety… he also wanted to stop using and he didn’t have anyone who could actually help him.

The love I had for him and they way I was feeling on the pink cloud led me to think I could help him, with love I was able to maintain so many days sober so I thought my love could help him too. I was obviously wrong. Dealing with someone else’s withdrawal symptoms plus their own mental health is by far the most difficult thing to do… so much that I ended up using only so I could deal with him and his mood swings, also I was escaping from him. the reality was that drugs only made worse what was bad already. He completed 30 days clean while I was on my 15th day of relapse. Please, never the less think that I am blaming this on him, I’m not. My own Ignorance made me vulnerable.

I’m happy to say that two months ago this relationshit finally ended .. and not with drama or police involved like it used to be but instead I kept it calm and asked him to leave. My addiction got worse. My excuses were that at least “I’m not doing it to scape”, “now I have a job” job that I can’t go to because of the depression I’m going through; so now that I’ve been of work for three weeks and I thought that this could be the best time to try and recover … or start over

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You’re here & that’s what matters! We dust ourselves off and go forward. Please don’t dwell on the past, it isn’t helpful. And, future tripping is wasteful too. Today is what matters.

Big hugs!

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Glad yiu made it back. What a lesson, I learnt from your experience and your interpretation , Thankyou. Can you pinpoint what triggered you emotionally? That emotions that was triggered can you identify them? Kind of rhetorical you don’t have to answer here; just to yourself :heart_hands:t3::heart_hands:t3::raising_hands:t3::right_facing_fist:t2::left_facing_fist:t2:

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Try a meeting might help concentrate on yourself your ex can go to meetings aswell if he needs help wish you well

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its great that you realize that and welcome back home

you can do this

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Thank youuu❤️

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It took me a while to but at least I did :heart: thank you

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Welcome and way to go on leaving that relationship. Something very similar happened to me with my ex. It was an extremely toxic and absuusive relationship yet I thought i could help him also when he was asking for help. Needless to say i relapsed with him. The only way to recover was to be rid of that relationship for good. Im glad u found ur way out! Im glad ur working on urself now :slight_smile: Keep checking in and stay connected. Take it one day at a time!

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