First Relapse, made it 103 days. So pissed

New here, probably should have hopped in sooner instead of going it alone.

Made it over 3 months, changing my life and feeling better than I have in years. Had disulfram to make sure I stayed clean. Skipped a dose and went for it the next day. Ended up blackout drunk in a way that was right at the top of my worst episodes.

Trying to move forward with a better plan, but having a hard time getting over the incident and forgiving myself. I have a wife and son (16 months) and I can’t be doing this crap anymore.

Anyone have some advice on a plan that works for them when the seed plants in the brain? When you know ur going to drink and nothing will stop you? Even if that choice is made hours before the act takes place?

Thanks everyone, I’m happy to be here.


I tried putting down the bottle for 4 year on my own with relapse after relapse. Id made it as far as 8 months with no alchohol and a couple 6 month and always had the week or two relapses. I thought i was strong enough to do it on my own, didn’t think AA was for me because i didn’t think i was that bad of a alcoholic, hell i didn’t like being called a alcoholic because i didn’t think i was back then. AA opened my eyes and made me realize i was. The alcohol caused nothing but problems in my life, marital and numerous runnings with the law. AA is a must for me. And find a daily readings book or two they help keep you motivated. Im creeping up on a year and i feel great. You may have feel off the wagon but it’s easy to get back on if you want it. Good luck my friend


welcome and well done for adding this tool to your recovery. Over 3 months sober is great going so firstly be proud of yourself for that and if that was the only slip do what you were doing before bc it was obviously working well for you. Now you’ve had a taste for it though its not always so easy to start where you left off. If your serious about quitting read and post lots on here, reach out before and not after, keep an eye out for your triggers and avoid them get in some online meetings, learn about your illness and why you will do and feel the way you do. We all know exactly what you are going through and none of us are so special that we have a miracle cure apart from the will to never stop trying, Never stop trying!!!.. I wish you well on your sober journey.


Maybe try a meeting they helped me no relapses so far wish you well

Yep. Just say no. Do something, do anything to stop yourself.
I had a couple of proper arguments with myself very early on. Walking towards my car then stopping and saying no! Then saying fukc it and walked towards my car, then shouting no again.
I’m sure you get the picture.
Thing I found though, was, that once I realised that I could say no, and that I wasn’t going to die, or implode without drinking, then it gave me the confidence to keep saying no!
I had faced the fear and won. And that’s what it comes down to really. We can all say that the voice told me to, or this happened or that happened, but really all we are saying is that we are scared to actually face the fear.
Believe me, we all can face that fear and we can all win.
Try it. You will suprise yourself!