Hi everyone. I wanted to let you know I ended up just giving her the tickets. There was no reason why I should have kept them, it’s her favorite band and I want her to be happy. Of course I’m hurt but at least I feel I did the right thing. I’ve been praying for her every day as suggested and wish nothing but the best for her because I truly do love her and love is kind. Thank you for all of the support you gave me it really helped me through a really tough time. Namaste 
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You did what made you feel at peace so good on u that takes strength,I’ve followed your story from the start.i hope now u can really move on BC holding onto them kind of feeling can destroy a person emotionally.
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Thank you @Lilemm, I hope I can move on soon. I don’t have much peace and it is still hurting a lot but I think it was the best thing to do. I’m really hurt because I didn’t get a thank you or any reply from her in regards to the tickets. I guess I put to much expectations on her. I didn’t think I would win any points with her, I was just being kind but it really does hurt that I’m not even worth a thank you to her. I feel like I want to send her an email describing how I feel but it will just probably hurt me more when I don’t get a response back after putting my heart out there. Definitely a very painful thing to go through in early sobriety for sure. Sucks but it is what it is I guess. Thank you for the support have a great day
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I can feel your pain Rob, it truly is a test for you going through it and staying sober. You could write the letter anyway and not send it, it would feel good to get it out. Expectations, I’ve let them go a long time ago. Serenity prayer helps.
You’re a good guy and good things are on the way, nothing stays the same. 
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Thank you @anon79808082, I’m going to write her a letter and I’m going to srart journaling again, it does help for sure. Have an awesome day and thank you again for your help and support
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I know for myself during various breakups over the years, I would write that letter…but not send it. Often I would create a ritual saying good bye and wishing peace and prosperity to the ex…burning the letter and saying a few words of letting go. Releasing it all back to where it came from. Letting go can be hard, but also freeing. Opens you up to new opportunities to get to know your self better. Hugs.
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Thank you @SassyRocks I appreciate your support, going to write as many letters as it takes until it subsides lol. Have an awesome day today
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That’s a great idea!!! Keep writing til it sticks, I know it can take awhile, but we DO heal.
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I feel you I was going through the same scenario early recovery just like you,but I found like you I found valid but not true to ourselves reaso s to keep some type on communication going just incase things changed more so for me it was about not fully letting go BC I lived in hope secretly that things to maybe go bk or move on from where they had stopped eventually I had to get really honest with myself and come to terms with all this,I’m not saying this is your personal experience but I do see alot of similarities,and tbh to not even get a thankyou is downright disrespectful in my eyes let go best you can try to have no more contact it’s just prolonging the pain for you,I’m always here if you ever want to get a women’s perspective as it’s great to see it from both sides ,I wish you all the strength you need to move forward,YOUR A GOOD MAN DONT EVER FORGET THAT .put your recovery first and and all will fall into place,
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Wow @Lilemm thank you for that and I am here for you too and anyone that ever needs someone to talk to for support. Strength in numbers for sure. I’ve been wondering why it’s been so hard to just let go and I realized that the majority of emotions are stemming from childhood trauma I never dealt with which makes the situation so much more intense than what “normal” people might feel. I’m starting trauma counseling today for the first time and I’m 100% ready and willing to face the past and deal with the things that I have to so I can heal. I’m tripping out because I’ve been sober before but I have never been in recovery until now. It’s scary but exciting at the same time. Thank you for sharing your experience with me!
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You did the right and proper thing, severing one more emotional and material tie to this past relationship. This shows you are moving forward.
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Thanks @Yoda-Stevie for the encouragement, it’s good to hear that I’m moving forward even though I’m “feeling” like I’m moving backwards. Perspective is so important and we need each other to see clearly when we can’t. I’m so grateful that I found this forum it’s such a blessing thank you guys.
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It shows acceptance. Moving backwards would be holding on to them in the hope that by maintaining the connection the relationship could be resurrected, or worse, a sign of spite.
But you let go, which means you are in the acceptance stage, ready for that next chapter in your life-story. This is good. You are getting better at getting better. Better today than you were yesterday, and tomorrow better still. It may not feel that way, but from my vantage point, you are moving forward.
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Yes my trauma from a child and how I deal with relationship or rejection also stems from way back them,I’ve never done trauma councelling I may look into that for myself see one addict helping another it really does work if you work it.
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Absolutely @Lilemm! I’m tired of starting over and over. Knowing that trauma in my past has been causing so much pain and damage in my life I am finally willing to put the work in for myself and heal. Recovery is not for the faint of heart for sure.
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