Getting through the craving

After I left treatment, I ended up getting my job back…I had told my boss NOT to schedule me for 40+ hours since I havent worked in almost 5 months because I didnt want to get overwhelmed. Knowing my hisyory, I know that being overwhelmed was one of my downfalls…well he had me working everyday besides Modays…6 days a week, 8 hr shifts…I couldnt handle it. I pulled into work, and I sat there. I had just cashed my check, $500 in my pocket, a great friend of mine had just overdosed. I ended up getting this great idea to leave, drive to Milwaukee and use. Thinking that no one would know. Well, I started to drive, I could literally taste the drug, I anticipated it, it was the worst feeling in the world. I called my sponsor, no answer, calle some other people and no one would answer. I finally decided to just pull over, I cried, prayed and cried some more…I just kept surrendering, hoping that would be enough to get through what was happening. After a little bit, it went away. I immediately went to the bank and opened a savings account so I didnt have all that money on hand. It was verg hard to do what I did, but I DID IT!! And I couldnt be happier with myself. I thank my higher power for just being an awesome God. Thanks for listening. #onedayatatime #onesecondatatime

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For someone that gets overwhelmed and couldn’t handle it that’s one amazing act of strength and self-determination!
I believe in God (or a higher power, or that spark of the Divine inside us all) but I also think you have to take credit and inspiration for what YOU just achieved @J12.
You took a situation that was spiralling out of control and you turned it around into something incredibly positive.
Thanks for posting - we all need a reminder that we should never get too complacent because Hell’s only a step or two behind us.

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