My heart is just a pile of broken glass. I have been seperated from my ex for 18 months. She was working on getting clean, and doing it. Stupid me only receantly came to terms with my alcoholism and the depression it has had me in. So all the time im waiting for her to get a handle i just kept drifting further away holding onto my resentments. Now she is moving on and its my own fault. I hope i can learn from this. In the meantime i am dying inside as i examine all the mistakes i made. I have barely eaten since monday and thankfully i have no desire to drink. I need to feel this pain and hold it as a reminder of why i need to stay sober. Thanks for listening.
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Friend, if you lay a sober head on your pillow tonight, then you are a winner. You win the chance to try it again differently tomorrow.
Reach out to your higher power to hold you together thru this. I know that every little thing is gonna be alright. 
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Sorry about your breakup. Keep feeling and doing life sober. It gets better.
I agree with @SinceIAwoke. As long as you can get through this sober, you are on the right track. I definitely know what you are feeling and I am very sorry you have to go through this as I have been there myself. But, I got through it and you can too, Iâm sure of itđ
Like said, lay your sober head on a pillow, take some deep breaths, and rest my friend. You will make it through this, I promise. Nothing is your fault. Everyone heals differently! Donât be hard on yourself.
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Keep getting stronger my friend. The common phrase on here is " this too shall pass"
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Thanky you all. It was a long night.
Getting sober allows us to really feel things, especially in early sobriety. Its tough, but like @SinceIAwoke said, every day you dont drink is a win and you are looking at it the right way to not try to bury those feelings in a bottle.
Have you ever read the book the 4 agreements? It helped me change my life and let go of resentments. I had many when my ex and I split, thats when my best friend gave me that book and I started healing. Beating yourself up for a past you canât change wonât help anything. All you can do is take what you know now and create a new future instead! 
Wish you well my friend!
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All you can do is make yourself worth something. Make and show your value and things will fall into place. You may find a better woman as the better you shows. Dont count your eggs before they hatch. We have a full life ahead of us and its destiny is what we make it. A better n sober you is the only shot u have at redeeming yourself. You will have to be patient as this doesnt happen over night. My patience is about the size of a tic tac but i have learned in sobriety to just be patient and if i do my part things will follow.
This is the mentality that helped me over a year ago when I quit meth. My story is similar to yours in one aspect. Where my ex left me to get sober. Unlike yours mine couldnât last sober while I did. Thatâs not the point. The point is, it took me feeling all the pain and sorrow⌠The self examinationâŚ
Then I took that pain and self examination and wrote out the things I thought were wrong with me and worked on those things everyday. I would spend time looking in the âaccountability mirrorâ asking myself âwhat have I done to make myself happy today?â âTo what have I done to strengthen my mind?â To further the point. Everything your feeling may be all encompassing but if you use it to fuel the drive inside you to be a better person anything that enters your path will be destoryed. I believe in you. Now you just have to believe in yourself.
Stay strong and focused my friend.
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No but i will pick it today. Thanks i will try anything to shut the screaming in my head.
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Thank you those are moving words and will take it to heart.