Yes, totally agree with you. If something is playing on our minds it’s usually a sign that we have to work out why. I see this again as an ego problem. @Barry_Barrus has spoke about the ego on another thread.
Hate is such a hard word. Yes I am the first person to stand up and say how much hatred and war and suffering is being done in the name of religion. Globally!
But, just look at all the people who find solace in their faith.
Tolerance is the key word I think.
As they say " keep your side of the street clean"
I say it because it almost feels disrespectful not to. I’m strangely uncomfortable in a room full of people who speak of god, and me being outnumbered by at the very least 10 to 1. I’ve never spoken of my feelings about god or the fact that I’m agnostic with people because religious people will go off the deep end. I think I just need to get more comfortable in my skin with my feelings towards other people’s god. I haven’t found confidence in those rooms yet, but I will work on it. Especially since I need to stay true to myself. Saying those prayers with them feels so fake, and that has never been the person I am.
Yes, tolerance. I was writing about that in my journal a few days ago. That’s another thing I need to work on when it comes to any type of religion. It really grinds my gears. I know that it can be a beautiful thing for some people, but I get so caught up in the destruction caused in the name of their god. But in reality, all those people in those rooms that have god, they use him to help them maintain their sobriety. There’s nothing wrong with that. Now I just need to keep that in mind every time I’m at a meeting lol
I hear you Amy. I see that as part of the letting go process.
I used to read the papers or watch the news and get so wound up with all the news and the biased way it was being reported. Yes there are some real attrocities being done in the name of religion.
But part of getting sober for me was to let go of all the anger I held over things that ultimately I had no control over. ( See serenity prayer)
And don’t look at that as God. If you search the web there are a lot of versions that have removed the god word to make it more comfortable with non religious people.
A little story for you.
I was brought up Christian. Church of England Went to church every Sunday, christened, confirmed, altar boy.
I stopped believing as I got older, firm in the belief that if there was a gracious god, why the pain and suffering.
The morning my mum died I came back from the hospice, told my daughter and went and sat in church. On my own. Praying, meditating, reflecting? Call it what you will. I felt odd being there, my conscience telling me if I don’t believe why am I here, but something, perhaps my Higher Power? was telling me it was ok. You know what? I felt at peace.
A few weeks later I had a dream. My mum was lowering herself into a pool of water, with lotus flowers, waterfall, you know, all the clichéd spiritual stuff. I woke up feeling happy and felt a major weight lifted!
I spoke to a spiritualist I know and she said that that image of the pool is what they use to lead people into meditation.
This has gone on a bit, but I felt it might help you think on things a little different. When it is said that you should open yourself up to all possibilities when trying to get sober. I, personally, took that to mean literally open myself up. Spiritually. Be open to all possibilities!
Thanks for reading, if you have got this far.
For some reason everytime I go to my step meeting it seems to be a step 2 discussion. LOL. I swear that at least 90% of the participants talk about their struggles with finding a higher power and God in the meetings. I think only 1 has ever said that absolutely his higher power is the Christian God, a few have not specified. But most will say that they struggled with this whole God thing.
Talk about it. People are there to share and support. If you share how you are feeling you may find out that someone else feels the same way and was too afraid to speak up. Sure, there may be a few who will tell you that you can’t get sober if you don’t have God, but ignore that. That’s THEIR recovery. You are there to find your own.
I adhere to AA God. I don’t follow any particular religion, but God rolls off my tongue nicely so I use that word. Something keeps me sober (God, people in the rooms, flying spaghetti monster, I really don’t know) and that’s all I really need to understand about my version of God.
You may find that a lot of the others are just saying it not to be disrespectful too!! LOL
When I first went to meetings I would stand silent while the Lord’s Prayer was recited. I see MANY in my circle stay silent still. I do now say it, not because I believe it, but because it was something that I grew up with. I don’t know how to explain it but I’m trying to regain some of the feelings I had as a child as a way to heal from what I’ve become as an adult. I didn’t believe in God as a kid either, but I did have a feeling that there was something bigger than me and that brought me comfort. I don’t know. I’m sure that makes no sense. But basically when I say the Lords Prayer I am saying it to someone/something else and it is bringing me that comfort I had as a kid. But I’m not going to head out to church on Sunday or anything.
Thank you for sharing your story. I’m working on opening myself up, but sure it will take time. I wasn’t raised going to church really. But I would have to listen to my father go on Jesus rants for hours while he was wasted all the time. Maybe that’s where my resentment stems from.
Congrats on your time! I’m an athiest as well. I went to treatment 3.5 years ago and have been sober since. At first i couldn’t stand seeing or hearing that word. God. Ugh. I didn’t believe in god and I wasn’t about to start. But i heard a lot of great things, for example,“Good Orderly Direction.” That was a game changer. That’s what i thought of everytime i heard or had to read the word god. Pretty soon it stopped bothering me all together.
Step 2, Came to believe that a power greater than ourselves… right? God is just a higher power. It’s something. Anything, that’s not you. I came to believe in a higher power and my higher power has helped shouoder my pain and struggles and never lets me walk this road alone.
Many people start with their high power as AA. AA is a power greater than yourself. It’s fantastic Good Orderly Direction.
Anyway, i suggest doing your best to not think of a guy in the sky when you hear that word. Think of a higher power. Best of luck! It works if you work it!
Im not an atheist (i was) not even agnostic. I just am, no need to categorize myself this,way. I respect others way of arranging their universe, wether it includes god or not. So, i dont give a s…t if there reads the word god or someone says his/her strength comes from god (edit meaning it doesnt disturb my peace of mind). The ultimate reason we are working the steps is not to drink/use/practice addictive behavior. The rest is just like buzzz of a fly
Have you checked out quad a? That is aa for Atheists and agnostics? Hopefully there is a meeting in your area. I’m in the Chicago area and those of the meetings where I feel at home.
