Had a small relapse. Need help!

So I had 42 days sober, I got paid, my normal meds changed with the doctor, my maintenance Dr. changed me to subutex by accident rather than my normal suboxone… this in turn brought on a string of migraines from hell and also a huge bout of depression where i didnt leave the house for a week… i struggled… i relapsed for one day…but for A LOT for one day, i wasted so much money, im now more depressed than i was before because im back at day 4 instead of fucking 42!!! i dont even know what to do right now im just venting before i do something stupid

xx

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Go to a meeting? Also let your doctor know that you are allergic to Subutex so you don’t get it again.

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Which would make no sense because the differance is in the sub that has nalaxone. Subutex doesnt have a opiate blocker in it. How many mg are you taking? Maybe lower your dose some as the subutex may be over loading your brain without the blocker causing a headache. Perks used to do this to me when i took alot. Also be sure to hydrate plenty!

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42 steps forward, 1 step back. Don’t beat yourself up too bad cuz that’s a really good ratio!

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Fixed the Subutex problem xx. Back on Suboxone. Just in this depression hell hole because of my step backwards. I’m so upset. Thanks for the kind comments.

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Don’t be. You’re here and fighting for sober you. Take that lapse in judgment and how it made you feel and use it as artillery for the next time you face a temptation. :muscle:

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Have you ever throught about tapering off the suboxone or talked about it to your doctor? These drugs still affect the brain and how you deal with anxiety and other feelings.

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I have tapered off of them. I find myself relapsing more often than not being off of the Subs… I hated the Subutex. It made me crazy. Now my PCP has me on Prozac and I feel even crazier. So I’m pretty much at a loss- also, the Suboxone is VERY costly!

Your not working a program or understanding the relapse. Your keeping contact with a user or dealer to relapse over and over. That life line needs cut off.

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The Suboxone will help with the withdrawal but it’s not what keeps you clean. You do that. Don’t let that crutch be your only leg. Don’t use coming off the subs as an excuse to use. If you do a proper taper the withdrawal shouldn’t be that bad. Once you’re off them focus on staying off them.

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I agree with everything that’s been said. Starting your timer over again isn’t the same as starting again at square one–it’s just a setback. Use it as a time to evaluate what you can do differently this time. But don’t beat yourself up…it proves you’re human, that’s all.

I actually deleted all contacts and blocked all numbers and deleted so I cannot contact anyone as well as I go to group 3x a week plus 1x a week hour therapy. So I am working a program.

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Yet i guess your drug of choice must have legs and jumps in your lap then? Somethings causing the relapse. All people have WANTS but we dont NEED it. So your doing some searching to find it…

You desperately need to stay in contact with a sponsor. Every time you have an urge to use, you need to call him! Seriously, that will help you a lot. Do you have a sponsor?

Thank you everyone for all of your help. I have been clean since my relapse. I have been seeing my therapist, going to my group 3x a week. Also at first I was hesitant to understand everyone’s responses to my problem. Once I understood, I was very happy with the help. Thank you again. I do not associate with ANYONE at all, that has anything to do with any type of drugs. That was absolutely a HUGE problem that I did not want to see. Thank you for making that clear to me. I finally got a good job, I start next week, I have my head on “straight” I’m ready to conquer every day that comes at me!

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Great news all! And yeah, in those early days it’s natural for us to think people’s responses are personal attacks on us. In early recovery we are still in the “it’s everyone else’s fault” mindset.

Then after a few weeks our heads begin to clear. We begin to see that everyone’s responses are coming from a place of expirience and love. It’s just From the age old phenomenon of "you can’t bullshit a bullshitter":wink:

I’m glad you are here pal. Thanks for the update. You are doing great!

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Thank you so much! :slightly_smiling_face::slightly_smiling_face::slightly_smiling_face:

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