This is the hardest time of night for me. The kids are in bed, the hubby has his beer in hand and football on and I would normally be popping the bottle of wine for a drink…and then another drink…and another…it’s frustrating but I can do it! I quit smoking four months ago, so I know I have it in me to battle the cravings…I’m just going to keep calm, work on the blanket I’m crocheting and try to relax until I can sleep. My first goal is to get that first day under my belt and then go from there.
You’ve got this! I just hit day 3.
Day 3 sounds awesome! Thank you everyone for the encouragement. It’s really frustrating, and I’m thinking up things I can do to keep busy during the night hours. I’ve always had trouble sleeping so I picked up some melatonin to put me to sleep at night. My husband asked me why I’m not having wine tonight and I told him I’m not into it anymore.
Made it through the night and onto the next one. I stuck it out, crocheted and kept calm and the craving eventually passed. I noticed that while I was sitting there and my husband was drinking one after the other, he started to irritate me. Once he reached that point where his buzz turns into a drunk, the way his body moves and he wobbled when he walked got on my nerves. I know when I was pregnant with my son it used to get on my nerves then too.
I mostly just ignored him until a fight broke out between our neighbors and I had to stop him from getting involved. I try not to be hypocritical, and the entire time I was reflecting on how I act when I’ve reached that point. I was thinking about his actions and how they irritated me while pregnant and sober and asking myself why I even picked up the bottle again after my son was born? Why and how did I allow myself to act like a fool and get to the point where the walls come down and the feelings of others meant nothing? I do know and will admit that drinking is one thing we did together and got along over. And when I was pregnant, I felt a little left out but knew my son was more important. Now I just think if either one of us is going to be responsible, it’s going to be me. My husband and I will just have to find other things to do together.