Has anybody had to push their best friends away or at least stay clear for a while because they are addicts too? I see my 2 best friends at least once a week for the past 13 years but they are heavy drinkers too…has anybody had any experience similar to this and what did you do?
I totally did. I became a hermit. I stayed away from everyone.
Since I’ve told my best friend 3 weeks ago that I would no longer be drinking…I haven’t made it to see her yet… which we would every week! I just am not ready to be around her yet because a lot of the times we would be drinking together and quite frankly I believe she has a drinking problem herself. I miss her terribly so but my sobriety has got to come first! We have been best friends for 20 years! Not sure when or if we’ll ever spend time together again.?
Find new friends
It’s normal. You don’t have to find new friends but in the beginning you should stay clear of them until you feel you are strong enough not to drink just because others are drinking. In the long run, if you see that the only common thing you have is drinking, it’s time to search for other hobbies and maybe other people to spend your time with. But if you’re able to be with your current friends even when you’re not drinking then there is no need to find new ones. I have been on my first real night out with mine last weekend. I was on day 69 then…I had the time of my life. They were drinking, I wasn’t but it was still super fun. The only difference was that the next day I was fully functional at 7am, even though I was home at 4am, and they weren’t. But that’s not my problem.
I don’t really have any friends so I wouldn’t know, but I can certainly understand about how that might be difficult.
I’m more worried about my family…!
Yea, been there, its not uncommon to need to change your people up, at all. My best friends drink still, but if they are drinking i either dont go to the event and explain why or only go for a little bit and leave early. Also usually take a sober buddy with me. Because if they are true friends, theyre going to understand your situation and only want the best for you… In early sobriety i did miss out on cook outs, parties, etc. But that was ok with me, i just did something else to occupy my time. Plus now its winter and not a whole lot goes on in my town in the winter. Also see if they can have a get together without alcohol present so you can be apart of… Now other acquantences that you only drink with, nothing else in common, youll need to find new people to hang with. But as far as your best friends, you can still hang, just without the alcohol, or get some sobriety under your belt… Hope this helps!