Welcome back hun.
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Welcome back. I can honestly say, been there, done that! It sounds like you will learn from this. That little voice always says, āI havenāt had a drink for X days, so I donāt have a problem. I will moderate this time.ā But having that 1 or 2 always turns in to 10 or 12 or 20ā¦ Itās all or nothing. Choose nothingā¦ always. 
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Welcome back Jen!! So glad to see you!
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You were happy during your sober time, it showed in your posts and pics. You will get there again, starting with today. Iām glad to see you back. 
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Praying that the setback is to set up for a life of being clean and sober. Day 6 from being clean of meth and alcohol. Yesterday was my hardest day - Work up from having addiction dreams, sweats, and intolerable with my family. But I took my meds, went for a walk, and prayed and meditated when I felt I was wondering in my mind. YOU can do this! YOU have a purpose and meaning in life YOUR best days are ahead of you. His Amazing Grace was with you on Friday, Yesterday, Today and Forever ā¦ we donāt deserve it - But He loves - We love you!!! String those minutes to days - and what Iāve learned this last time - is try to be transparent (I can inside here) until Im brave to be on the outside - Keep your head up
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I know your feeling, I used to have a number of little shops which were on route on the way home from work, Iād call in a different one each day, so I could avoid the embarrassment of them knowing that I drank every nightā¦ Once, in one of the shops, it was a Tuesday night, I had my work clothes on, the checkout operator commented āoh, itās been one of those days today for you?!ā Whilst gesturing towards the wineā¦
I remember it clearly, and I actually thought back through my day, and no, it wasnāt, it was a fine day, a normal run of the mill, usual, bordering on good day. The only thing stressful about the day was feeling like crap from about midday, which was usual, due to alcohol withdrawal, and then fighting the daily internal monologue of wanting/not wanting to buy booze.
Drinking sucks.
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Welcome backš¤ The single most important thing is that you came back. Iām glad youāre here.
Itās none of our business what other people think about us but i get it. I use to be at the store first thing in the morning half drink to buy a case of beer, id usually buy another that evening before they closed.
Youāve answered the moderation question now, donāt forget it. If we never fail the same way twice eventually success will be our only option 
. Youāre back be proud of that choice.
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Thanks for all the comments 
Iām feeling a little better now and not so hopeless, I can do this again.
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You sure can! And you will.
This first week is tough but hang in there
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Welcome back. I know the feeling; it sucks, but youāre here now among friends. Stick aroundā:mask:
; we like you. Zoom meetings have been great for me especially when Injust didnāt want to leave the house.
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Hey Jen, welcome back sweet lady! I used to shop at alternate stores tooā¦
the good news is we never have to do that ever again. Iām glad youāre back with us, weāve missed seeing you around. Be gentle with yourself lovely, weāre her for you 
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Glad youāre back! You got this!! 
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My friend is upset with me. He came round on Friday and I was so hammered he just left and went home. We were really looking forward to seeing eachother as weāve seen no one else in weeks either. I apologised to him for my behaviour but hes really laying it on thick about the state I got myself in and he making me feel so shit. Its fair enough I suppose hes right to be disappointed in me.
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Welcome back Jen! Glad to see you again!
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Hi and welcome back. I too am on my second time around and 11or12 days in.,I was gutted when I relapsed but this is a pretty good place to be and I know you can do this, just because you gave up once it doesnāt mean you canāt do it this time any help I can give your welcome to we are all in this together xx
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Hey, you still have the 9 months of sobriety, you didnāt die in your sleep and miraculously Barking Boris seems to have organised 4 million first vaccinations as of today, so hopefully this cycle of Lockdowns will be over soon! Itās a shame your friendās not cutting you some slack though, but thereās no benefit in upsetting yourself about it. Youāve been a great member of the community and you are going to be again. If a knacker like me can manage 4 years Jen, you can get over this bump in the road. Everyoneās rooting for you!
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Welcome back! What did u do last time u quit for 9 months? I find a sobriety routine helps (read ts in the morning, listen to a meeting on this day, others do journaling, meditation). I also went to different shops, but when drunk but had run out would always go to the local ones cos too drunk to ride my bicycle. My stomach would be in knots the next time I went in I was so embarrassed.
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I just made the decision really, Iād gotten to the point where I was so sick of it and ashamed of myself that I didnt want to go back. This time feels worse than that. Also spent a lot of time on here and got into a healthy eating and dieting plan which I need to do again. This time Iāll be doing zoom meetings too. Weāre in full lockdown so I have to be on the ball with homeschooling my daughter. Weekends will be tricky when shes with her dad, but Iāll be starting my new job in a few weeks so thatāll fill up my time. In the mean time Iāll come here for support and join the Saturday zoom sessions so Iām not alone.
Had a good sleep last night but still feel pretty shitty today. Probably wont be back to normal until tonight/tomorrow but the least the guilt has subsided a little.
Weird thing happened lastnight, I was seeing a guy back in the summer, only for a few weeks then he went sort of cold on me, I asked him what was up and he didnt have much to say so I called it a day. I was upset about it at the time (cue a big drinking bingeā¦) but i deleted his number and after a week or so passed havenāt really thought much about him since. Well I got into bed last night, determined that that would be the last night I would go to bed feeling like that and was reflecting on everythingā¦ and he messaged me right out of the blue 
I didnt know who it was at first as I didnt have his number. Iām not excited about it. In fact (even if it was his intentionā¦) I think dating is a really bad idea now, it always involves alcohol to some degree and I need to be far far away from that whist I get some serious sober time under my belt. So Iām getting rid of my online dating profile after Iāve typed this out and if he messages me again heāll be getting told Iām not interested too, good that he messaged in a way though because in that moment, in the state of mind I was in it made me go āwoah there!! No I dont need THIS right now either! 
ā so itās made me think about the whole dating thing and I know itās not right or a good timeā¦ online dating leads to alot of disappointment and I need to do what I can to protect my emotions whilst Iām in a vulnerable place.
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Home is a place where no matter how long youāve been gone, someone is happy when you return.
God loves His prodigal children, and we are all prodigal children.
Welcome home. I hope you stay for a good long while.
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I just reset mine also so you are not aloneā¦we in this together
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