Iāve struggled with alcohol for so long . I grew up with a good family , no trauma , but drinking was what we do. My dad died of liver failure , my brother has cirrhosis. I got sober in 2019 and was the happiest and most successful Iāve ever been in my life . I lost my 20 year career in 2022 due to a bad fraudster situation. Ended up in jail due to an ugly relapse and Iāve never been in trouble in my life. I got back on track , promised myself Iād be different and I did just that . I got a new job in the same career and I felt great. I lost my mom July 2023 and I absolutely adored her . I relapsed again but this time worse than ever. I lost my new job this week due to drinking at work. How embarrassing and Iāll never get in the same field again . Iām so ashamed of myself and canāt remember anything . I had to move in with family . Iāve lost everything and completely ruined my life. Can you get back on track after such a fail ? Why do I keep doing this when I know itās so wrong 
. Iāve followed this site for many years and I just needed to write for support
Hereās a snapshot of my journey to 1,000 days. Iām well over 1700 now.
Snapshots of my journey and my mind.
Of course you can get back on track. As long as you draw breath you stand a chance. Youāve been through some rough shit and decided to numb instead of deal. You get your life back by not drinking today. Weāre all here for you.
This thread right here is one of the best reads here.
Hi Kelly weāre glad you are here reaching out.
This is what you are working for. Being truly happy. Of course life can throw us some pretty rough curve balls and test our resolve. But coming back and trying again shows that you are taking steps in the right direction.
Absolutely! Making the choice to stay sober will be the foundation of rebuilding your life and happiness. We have all had those moments when we felt hopeless and overwhelmed, but making one small step after another will get you where you want to be over time.
Simply put, addiction is powerful. But you can beat it. One day at a time. You can do it! Weāre here for you 
Of course you can get back on track. And then some.
Addiction & recovery arenāt competitions (and I know that your pain is real) but Iāve heard the most insane, I-canāt-believe-how-amazing-and-successful-this-person-is stories while Iāve been in recovery. I mean, things that make me feel so. grateful. that I didnāt have to go through such things (even though my pain is real, too).
Things can always be worse; however, they absolutely can get better.
I try and stay focused on the clichĆ©d, One Day At A Time. Because, I canāt get bogged down in shame, guilt, & regret over things that are in the past. Nor can I get too focused on whatās in the future.
I just do my best to stay in the middle, keep living my amends, work the Steps, go to meetings, and reach out/ask for help.
Give yourself a break & be kind to yourself. 
Thank you Dan. I scrolled through your recovery posts a bit so far and sounds like youāve been through a lot as well. What an amazing recovery story . My plan- I was hospitalized in detox Monday , now staying detoxed with family until I can get into rehab . Iām at a realization I canāt do this on my own and happiness isnāt having the perfect job , car , etc. if youāre just killing yourself anyway. I needed to hear this and others tell me Iām not crazy. I feel crazy most days but Iāll hopefully get through it. Thank you again !
Lost my brothers one in May 2017 one in Dec 2017 My identical twin brother in July 2020 my fav cousin in 2021 my fav aunt she was {101) in 2022 through that i didnt need a drink i knew it wouldnt help had a good program in place and good friends at my meetings for support , life throws things at you and if you have a good defence, its hard but a knew a drink wouldnt sort it out only make it worse. back on the horse hold the reins abit tighter now , coming up for 38 years sober now in sept no relapses no slips so it works if you work it wish you well
My mother always says āif there is a will thereās a wayā
Hereās my story:
I drank, I got into some trouble. So I drank more, and had more trouble come my way. I continued drinking, and the trouble got serious. Went like this spiraling down daily for 20 years or so.
3 Detoxes, a 60 day rehab, and several months in a 1/2 way house got me started in sobriety. Kept straight now for over 40 years. Life is much better !!
Welcome back Kelly 
im glad ur here. Sounds like uv been thru alot the last while. Its easy to feel defeated when uv lost so much. But u absolutely can build urself up again and make a new life for urself.
There were many things thay happened in my life where i thought there was no coming back or i wondered how i was going to build a life for myself after all i had been thru. I started using drugs at 15 years of age, stsrted working the sex trade to support my habit/to survive, was in an abusive relationship for 5 years, all while I got worse and worse into my addiction. Even when I overdosed, that wouldnt stop me from using a week later. Its pure insanity what we put ourselves thruā¦ doing the same thing over and over and expecting a diff result. When i was at my bottom, i wondered how i was going to make a life for myself but thankfully recovery took care of that. I got clean when i was 37 and as i began working on my recovery, alot of amazing opportunities and doors opened for me, the healthier i got. I truly do believe that if u stick to sobriety, opportunities will show themselves to u The options are endless when we lead a healthy clean and sober life. It may be hard to not worry about ur future as it stands right now but instead focus on ur recovery and getting sober. See where that takes u
Use that shame and fear to motivate you to go to bed sober tonight. The only way to move forward is to guard against going backward again. Now that everything has been stripped away build back on a sober foundation.
My story: I knew I had a problem from my first drink at age 14 or 15. Everyone else was casually sipping their beer and when there was the risk of parental discovery I (helpfully) went around to finish everyone elses cans. I didnāt even feel drunk.
I drank like a fool for 30ish years after that. I always volunteered to be the drunk driver to get everyone home āsafelyā. Even after an OWI at 22, where my boyfriend at the time was proud that his girlfriend could blow a .26 and not even seem that drunk. I was proud too.
Iāve cried and vomited and pooped in public drunk. Iāve totaled cars and relationships but the things drinking never brought me were self-respect, a focus in life or emotional honesty. Thats where sobriety steps in.
As someone with a grandfather who died of a wet brain I also have a family predilection to alcoholic ruin. Make sure it misses you. Start working a program, if that one doesnāt work find a different one. Spend hours on here daily learning what other addicts have learned. Read quit lit, start working out. Anything is possible in sobriety. Welcome back. š©·
Honestly, I see a lot a advice posted.
Itās helpful and stabalizes a good foundation to staying sober but isnāt what matters.
But one thing that worked for me was āfinding a reason that matters to youā beyond the reason to use again.
May that be a job or something?
Tried to quit weed for years, felt like it was impossible.
What made me stop? Just like that?
A position in a railway job. $50+ per hour.
Mandatory drug test.
Find the reason that matters to you.