# Honestly, I'm doing great **URL:** https://talkingsober.com/t/honestly-im-doing-great/146979 **Category:** Life in Recovery **Created:** [July 13, 2022, 1:43pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/honestly-im-doing-great/146979 "2022-07-13T13:43:04Z") **Posts on this page:** 1 **Showing post:** 2
### Author: ![Matt](https://talkingsober.com/user_avatar/talkingsober.com/matt/32/94732_2.png) [@Matt](https://talkingsober.com/u/Matt) #### Post date: [July 13, 2022, 1:58pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/honestly-im-doing-great/146979/2 "2022-07-13T13:58:07Z")
Welcome back @Ren! 👋 it’s good to see you again. I’m glad you’re safe and sound. It sounds like you’ve been reflecting on who you want to be, and what part of you might be clinging to old escape / avoidance routes, and what that part of you is doing. (It’s in all of us: at some point when we were younger, we developed a part of us, an identity, which runs away, into the addiction. It’s an isolating, numbing, escaping part of us. It’s troubling; it’s a challenging part of our identity, as we work to grow past it. I’ve been working on that myself too. I’ve come to understand that I can’t erase the Hiding Matt. He’ll always be part of my history, and he remains filed away in my mind. But I work to let him go. I am “retiring” him; I will be giving him a retirement ceremony this summer. I’m not running or escaping any more; I don’t need to. He can live in retirement now while I grow other parts of me.) Re: eating disorders, that is something that comes up often, and there’s some really good threads here on that. Check out these two for example. You are not alone: > [@Stella's Cracked Looking Glass \*\*\* Trigger Warning ED \*\*\*](https://talkingsober.com/t/stellas-cracked-looking-glass-trigger-warning-ed/124417): > > I have decided to document this journey in a thread. After entering my meal on the foodie’s thread and then sitting down and mindfully eating through tears, many thoughts and feelings were coming up. I think sharing this could be valuable to others, and if not, then at least therapeutic for me. Anyways I will start with a bit of a back story… I grew up in a family of women with disordered eating. It has been passed down through the generations. From my grandmother to my mother to me. Maybe ev… > [@Ed frustrations and family \*trigger warning](https://talkingsober.com/t/ed-frustrations-and-family-trigger-warning/130126): > > So for as long as I can remember my mom has been on a diet. I remember as a little girl my mom saying oh I can’t eat that or that will make me fat if I eat that. She talked about weight my entire life. Loosing it, being afraid to gain it. When I was 14 I started to have the same fears. I was full blown anorexic by 15. I was 5’7, 96 pounds and hospitilized because I fainted working out in my room. I would work out 2 hours a day and heavily restricted food. My weight normalized in college when I l… Take care and don’t give up Ren. Choose what you want and who you want to be, and trust in her, nurture her, be kind to her, encourage her, believe in her. She is in you. She is you. You can be the person you are, the full person, not hiding, not silencing, but fully present, for yourself and for the people you love. You belong and you matter, no matter what. --- _[View the full topic](https://talkingsober.com/t/honestly-im-doing-great/146979)._