“Wow. i’ve come a long way”
i’ve been dreaming of sobriety, or of the benefits of a sober life, since i was 16. I’ll never make excuses but i’ve been through the wringer and on top of that addictive personalities have been a killer in my family for generations. A few months ago i went through the breakup of all breakups and drinking, as per usual, was a crutch. I’ve tried many times, far too many to count, but today feels different. i feel what i can only describe as a calm anger, or maybe this is just what life saving motivation feels like. i poured everything i had into the sink, and today ive gone the longest i have in months without drinking, which is about the last 20 hours. to harken back to the title of my post, i hope that i don’t let my future self down. i want to look back at this and be completely unfamiliar with these awful feelings and cravings. i want this portion of my life to be a fading memory as soon as possible. I got myself back into college, i’ve held done a job for a month now, and i’ve lost 55 pounds. I’ve proven to myself that i can do the hard things, now all that’s left is to never drink again. should be a breeze, right? haha. Ive got this. and so do you with your battle.
