Hi lovely sober people,
I am 20 days sober today and trying to remain hopeful, positive, grateful, but I am failing. Every sober day I feel worse. Mentally I am at the lowest I’ve been in a very long time. May is a particularly difficult month for me with Mother’s Day and the anniversary of my mother’s suicide.
I am going to the same AA meeting every week, going early to help set up, staying late to clean up and chat but I do not know how to progress in the program. These women are amazing and welcoming but I guess I just don’t know what kind of help I should be asking for. Do I need to put a certain amount of time in before asking for a sponsor? Should I be worried about accepting a sponsor that I do not know at all? Is it better to wait and get to know the people in my group before jumping into a sponsorship?
I don’t want to rush but I am worried that if I don’t start working on my shit I am going to relapse. I am sober but still very very broken.
Anyone care to share how they began to recover and not just live sober?