If I ever think of the whole just 1 it reminds me of a fellow member who had just 1 and it lasted 7 years. I always thought that must have been a big ass cup to last 7 years!
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So many amazing responses.
@MandiH…yes. I was always “chasing the buzz”. One drink never gave me a buzz so I would have a second. That brought a lovely buzz that I didn’t want to lose so I had a third. The third didn’t feel as good so a fourth was had to try and feel better. Soon I was sleepy, and slurring my words, stumbling my way to bed. One is never enough!!
@Gabe.G…acceptance. I am an alcoholic. I’ll always be an alcoholic. Even if I never have another drink again in my life I know that 1 drink will never be one drink.
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I totally agree with this! I find if I manage “just one” one time, then I get cocky and the next time is a total blackout
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I think one gets to the point of accepting that our drinking isn’t normal drinking. I/We/you drink to get drunk. It doesn’t matter whether its wine,gin, cider or lager.
If you over drink, you over drink all the time. Do normal drinkers reflect on what’s better or worse? Probably not. Do they have to convince themselves they will just have one? Unlikely.
So, once you accept that your drinking and attitude towards alcohol is different and destructive, you accept that those sort of deals you do with yourself are just your ego telling you you can have what you want -but the deeper you knows it’s bullshit!
I can really recommend Blackout by Sarah Heppola on this.
Stay here too!
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I love these!!!
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I can remember as a young kid i would get mad at my dad at a restaurant or at sporting events for ordering alcohol beverages. He would tell me “just one ok son” and one of the times i told him “one leads to two, two leads to three and the next thing you know youre drunk” the “just one” rule dont work. On all my previous relapses i would buy just a 6 pack thinking that was ok. But then id just drink that and go buy more. For me i dont quit until every last drop goes down my throat. My wife would tell me how i would tear everything out of the fridge over and over again looking for more alcohol.
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I don’t know what it will take for you to rid yourself of the idea, but for me it was fact that I had too many times said “just one” and it was never “just one”. How many times should I try to pet the dog that bites me, before I quit trying to pet the dog?
I am a fighter by nature. Boxed in my youth. Served many years in the Marines. Been in an actual war. I decided to treat alcohol as an adversary, one that was literally kicking my ass. I realized that all I had to do was say “no” to the drink that matters…the first drink, and I would win the fight. To quote Bruce Lee “I mastered the art of fighting, without fighting”. If I don’t take the first drink, my defense is impenetrable.
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I’m not sure it’s easy, especially to start with, but it’s definitely more straightforward.
For me I got to the stage where more often than not, me drinking turned into a shitshow. Despite how much I romanticised the idea of getting drunk, or relied on it for something like a personality, it ended up pretty much the same way. So I knew there was no just one, just one = shitshow.
I found reading here, a lot, and learning about other people’s experiences with alcohol helped me to better understand my own. I realised that I actually identified a lot more with people that called themselves alcoholics than I might have expected. That a lot of people like me, who didn’t drink every day, were still struggling with alcohol and were having a better time of it sober. It showed me that it is possible and that there are lots of resources and support out there if I am willing to work at it, one day at a time.
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Well it’s taken me 45 years. And now at the ripe old age of sixty I think back to the last time I “just had one?” I Got Nothing!
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My new motto…”if you can’t have one, have none” … works a treat. I read here to say NO to the first drink and then you’ve won. So true! If I say YES like I did last ‘attempt’ that just opened the flood gates and I said yes everyday for a week…blackouts, waking up at 3am religiously feeling like shit and full of regret… Life is so much better when we learn to say NO 
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Just one never worked for me. Either I would just keep drinking or I would get in a bad/stressed mood because I wanted to continue the high of that first drink. It would just consume my thoughts so now I don’t let it anymore.
I like that very much. You’re a wise woman!
When my brain goes to “just one” i play the rest of the tape through in my head. I think of how fast the downward spiral will be. How much I will lose from just one. I remember how much i hated life after waking up the next day. Playing the scenario over in my head from start to finish helps me a lot. Good luck!
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I thank you for your encouraging post I made it to day 2 today because of people like you in this community so please keep posting this community probably is saving my life
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I loved reading everyone’s posts on this topic. They are all so relatable. Its simple. If you need to put rules (like just one or one drink then one water) you have a drinking problem. My family is full of normal drinkers. No rules. They can walk away from a meal with alcohol still at the glass and just dump the remainder in the sink. Not me. I had to drink every last sip. That’s because I have the addiction and not them.
Welcome to the group and the start of your life.
Hugs
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For me I wasn’t the everyday drinker, I was the social drinker that got completely hammered everytime I drank to the point of hurting myself,hurting others emotionally, becoming toxic to myself and everyone around me. It was never just one for me. 2 years in and I still get those thoughts when I hear a certain song but I shut it down immediately by reminding myself that one drink HAS NEVER been possible for me and would cause me to lose everything I’ve worked so hard for. My inner strength,dignity, integrity and work ethic - all things that came with my journey that no one ever told me about 
youre so strong 
keep fighting i believe in you
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I am the same way, I never had just one or two. My issue wasn’t that drinking was a part of every day, but at the end of the week I would always have a “cut loose” day that I justified because I worked all weeke and deserved it. Most times those nights didn’t end until xx AM the f9llowig morning.
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I can relate there, I would drink by myself after my son went to bed after a long week or a “deserving one” and who was i kidding, I always deserved one in my mind back then 
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No reason was to small lol same here. Just glad to put that stuff in the past where it belongs
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I like the phrase “one is too many and 20 isn’t enough”
If we were capable of having just one, we wouldn’t be here. Besides, just one doesn’t really give you much of a physical effect, so why even have it? It’s not worth the risk that one will turn into 20.
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