How do you tell someone you're struggling

Lately I’ve been on a self destroying war path. I’ve stopped working any and all programs, I’ve stopped going to church and I wanted to do something destructive so I bought alcohol removed wine (because I’m not ready to fully give up sobriety).
I have one significant support person and I feel like I need to tell him instead of isolating myself, but I’m afraid he’s over my BS. I lied to him about throwing away pain pills after I had surgery a few months ago and since then he’s been kinda distant. Which is fine, my fault & problem, not his.
What do I say to reach out? Do I even tell him?

have u tried any support groups, if not u can use this app as, an oulet until your ready to share, with your partner.


That’s a tough situation… cause the person you talk to is human, too… with that said, all of us get tired of the same bs someone we care about keeps doing. But, I say tell him anyway. The worst he can do is give you the cold shoulder. If that’s the case, that’s okay, too. Why? Because you are AWARE. You are TRYING. And you will be able to verbally get it off your chest with someone you trust. Remember this person cares. He will at least see you are aware and trying. Just apologize… A thousand times if you have to… you just MUST keep TRYING. That person can take care of their self.

OR - - - get a piece of paper and sit down. Write. Write EVERYTHING that’s on your heart. Your mistakes, your wants, your goals, everything. Give it to that person. You won’t have to say anything… except “please read this.”

… have you sought help from your regular doctor, if you have one?

You don’t have to respond to me… I just wanted to share my thoughts.


just remember that your recovery is for u, you will be a better person for yourself, u must care about yourself, dont worry so much about what others think of you, just keep doing good stuff for yourself, in time u can share with others, i do recommend sometipe of support group on the mean time, u gotta find something that works for u and your recovery.


im in the same situation. nobody knows how i feel or what inside me, besade all you hear.Thanks for that!


I totally agree with writing the letter. Always a great idea. He may realize that it took a lot more effort than just saying something. Write the letter. Outline how you are changing things and how you need to work to change other things. I am the type of person who doesn’t accept apologies as words (for the most part). I accept changes. Changes and actions are what is important to me. He may be the same.

However, l still think you should tell him in the meantime. I, personally, would only tell him that you just need someone to know what’s going on. That you don’t expect his help, you simply need to be accountable and open with someone.

It is hard for people to trust us when lying or hiding the truth has been our go to for so long. Show that you are changing and your relationship may start taking a turn for the better.


When I am struggling I hot-tail it to a meeting and put my hand up to share first thing and spill my BS. I force myself through the discomfort and anxiety and just do it, as I know it is the right thing to do. It ALWAYS helps me. Hoping you find what works for you. :two_hearts::bird::pray:


Thanks for the responses everyone. You’ve all been very helpful. It’s the anxiety and my pride getting in the way. I already know what he’s going to say and it’s going to hurt like a knife. But it’s the truth, no denying that. I can’t help but think he’s gotta be done putting up with all this BS especially when it’s the same crap over and over and he tells me what I need to do but I just don’t do it. I feel like I can’t bring it to him anymore .