How to be a good friend in this situation

Yeah this is basically what I need to accept. He doesn’t seem to want to do the FaceTime thing and we are in different states. So I’ll just have to wait until he is ready.

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Yesterday I cut ties with a years-long friend who I cared for like a brother but he was going down a self-destructive path where it is beyond my capacity and ability to help him get out of. It wasn’t alcohol- or drug-related but I think he has a sex addiction he’s downplaying. It got to the point where I questioned my friendship with him because he was disrespectful and his immaturity was a bad influence to me since I’m trying to better myself as an individual and as a woman. I was too nice and I think I unknowingly enabled him because I couldn’t tell him outright what he needed to hear for fear of upsetting him and/or triggering his suicidal tendencies.

It hurts since he was a friend for many years but it was time to move on from this friendship. I advised him to get himself together and talk to someone else about it because I will not be here to talk to him about it anymore. He is stuck in an on and off cycle and I can’t help him because he refuses to do something about it. He even thinks he’s doing other people a favor. That’s messed up.

I suggest you let him go and seek help because this is beyond your control. You can’t keep supporting and comforting someone who isn’t actively doing anything to change themselves because, like me back then until yesterday, you’d be unknowingly enabling him too if you don’t let go. You did all that you can do and you’ve been a good friend to him. You still decide what’s best for you after all this because it’s up to you. In the long run, it could affect your mental health and sobriety too with this unhealthy cycle. You don’t have to completely close the door on him too when he decides to knock again as a changed man.

All the best to you and God bless :pray:

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