This is my first post and I’m new to the boards. I’m 3 days sober but how do you all handle it when your friends and family all drink? I hate answering the question…why aren’t you drinking?? My husband knows my issue and he said he will be do whatever I need for support but he still is drinking. But then again…he doesn’t drink like I do.
I recently started riding a motorcycle and that has been my excuse lately. I just say that I don’t drink when I’m on my bike.
I know I probably need to be honest with folks but I’m so ashamed. I’m pretty high functioning until I’m not but really only my husband has seen the worst.
I had weight loss surgery almost 4 years ago and was never a big drinker until about 2 years ago. It has progressively gotten worse and I was drinking every day. I can’t eat a lot so I just replaced alcohol for food. I’m also seeing a counselor to deal with my transfer addiction.
Any thoughts? I look forward to this sober journey with you all!
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(Excuse the list format, I am a list maker :0)
- You aren’t anyone else. Drinking or not drinking is done for you. Not approval or fear of disapproval.
- You may well have to change friends, but what I think you’ll see is a lot of people aren’t necessarily your friend. They are friends w drinking, you just happen to be around when they do it.
- You may have to change places you go. I don’t go to the “drinking places” I used to go to drink.
4… If you have your husband’s support, that’s what you need. My wife wouldn’t date me for 5+ years bc I drank. Today, even though I am perfectly ok w her drinking if she chose to, she chooses not to.
This addiction won’t kill your friends or your coworkers or whomever-else-you-are-concerned-with. It will kill you. That’s got to be the focus.
I know, I am probably hard core and hard on myself and my posts can come across as such, but if I am not hard on me, alcohol will be. This is something you can do. It will take time and it will take help, but you can.
Best,
Chandler
Three years, eight months, twenty five days.
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You are just like me. I am high functioning and no one would ever be able to tell I have a problem with alcohol. I also live in Wisconsin where 99% of people are born with a beer in their hand.
I decided to come straight out and tell my friends. I told them I can’t control it, I can’t/never have just 1, and it is ruining my life! I even cancelled last weekend on a girls weekend at a Packer game. Surprisingly they all said they get it and will be there for me. I even have a close friend who admitted she has a problem and also wants to quit.
So, be honest and give them a chance. If they only want to be around because you drink are they worth continuing a friendship with?
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