I continue to relapse. My wife and I have finally actually decided to call it quiets for the billion time over the past 3 years but this is actually the first time in a long time I have actually followed through. I moved out and honestly have became so bitter and homeless by choice because I live 1 hour and 17 minutes away from her and I’s apartment. I don’t want to drink anymore. It makes a monster or the monster is inside and alcohol just releases it. I have not drinker today but I sure want to go get a few beers and call it a day. Is there anything besides writing , exercising, and music. I really want to drink bad . What do I honestly do to stay alcohol free???
Aa saved my life … i quit drink and drugs for 66 days on my own but it was hell… the day i walked into aa i finally felt people understand me … the help and love ive got through aa and ca is out of this world… i follow a simple programme called the 12 steps and it works … i have a sponsor who helps me with anything that botbers me so i dont have to put any pressure on my partner or family… id seriously look into it … cos its saved my life x good luck
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If what your doing isn’t working it’s time to do something different. After 2 years of constant relapsing I finally went to AA. I’m 5 months sober now and I feel no desire to stop. Give it a try.
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Wish i had a simple soultion to help you stay sober but i don’t. Im afraid your going to have to put in a lot of hard work.
I had to Change everything
I stopped going out to eat and to stores that sold alcohol
Took a different route home from work
Stopped going to parties
Told friends and family i quit
Kept busy, cleaned everything
Talked to my dr and got meds
Yoga
Meditation
Read and watched everything about the effects of alcohol
Came here every single day
Ultimately none of this was enough and i ended up in AA. I was scared but i wanted to stay sober and i decided to try anything. Best decision i ever made.
Today is 708 days sober for me.
Its not easy in the beginning but it does get better.
You can do this. Stick around there’s lots of great advice and support here
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What do i honestly do to stay alcohol free??
Simple go to a meeting get help meet new friends get phone numbers see if you can get a sponsor .
Effort makes it easier have to walk the walk wish you well
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The only way to stay alcohol free is to make the choice to stay alcohol free. It is soley on you to decide how you want to live. We can suggest things to help you change but it is on you to implement those changes.
I’m sorry to hear you and your person called it quits, however this is not a bad thing. This is an opportunity for you to address your own issues and in turn seize the opportunity to learn and grow and become a better man than you once were.
I wish you the best and in case you haven’t heard it today:
YOU’RE AWESOME & I LOVE YOU
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Find a meeting and get into it. I listened to a guy last night that shared he spent most of his spare time at AA to keep from giving in. They have meetings all day and if like the club I attend their is someone there almost all day. It’s full of people that really care.
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This is what helped me so far:
- No alcohol in my house
- Refrigerator filled with nice food and alc. free drinks
- Telling my spouse about my sober plan
- Avoid alcohol related activities and friends (at least in the beginning)
- Having a day counter
- Avoid wine/beer section in the supermarket and avoid liquor store
- Taking a strong vitamine B complex
- Taking melatonin to help me sleep
- Be gentle to myself, like go to bed early, taking a long bath, etc.
- Doing relaxing activaties like meditate, yoga, walking, etc.
- When I have cravings: I don’t pick up that first one but I walk, run, work out, eat chocolat, watch Netflix, clean, study, whatever.
- Ask for help when I need it.
- Be here every day to read and check in sober.
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The best way to get sober and stay sober is human connection. Some people find that connection from AA, some from forums like this, some from Church. That connection is key; we can’t do it alone, nor should we.
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It sounds like you have sacrificed a great deal on the alter of your addiction. Do you think it will ever be appeased, short of taking your life?
I can give you a whole bunch of tips and strategies that worked for me, as can a whole bunch of beautiful people here, all strong in their sobriety. Some went to rehab, some to AA, some to therapy, and a bunch of other approaches.
But these are just tools to help you. It must begin with you. You have to decide to draw the line at what you’ve lost thus far, and vow not a single step further back.
Everytime you take that first drink, realize that you are jumping off a cliff in the dark. You have no idea where bottom is, and thus no idea how far the fall is. It’s not the fall that hurts…it’s the sudden stop at the end.
Decide to be better, and then set about getting better. We can help you with the second part, but the first part can only come from you. In order to accomplish anything, one needs two things: the will and the means.
Welcome. I hope you stay, learn, grow, and share.
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Thank u so much for your support and your time.
How have you been?