I give up! I’m just gonna drink until my liver says fuck it! I have tried too many times to give up alcohol and it never just goes away! Life goes on!
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You sure you wanna do that? If you’re posting here, you’re probably having second thoughts.
How ever bad this moment is, will picking up make even one part of it better? Play the tape through, man.
For me it was always another wasted day. Feeling like garbage, probably doing things I regret. Making things worse and being back on the death spiral of drinking.
What if you don’t though? What if you just take a walk? Clear your head? Call a friend? At least keep that clear head? Things may get better, and at least not get worse.
Deep breaths, brother. Just don’t pick up today, no matter what.
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I felt like that. I came on here, said something like that…and @SassyRocks set me straight.
There is a better life. Quitting is hard, but the end result is SOOOOOOOOOOO much better.
Try coming on here daily
Being active on here saved my life. I came on here, read everything, posted every day, was active on any thread I could be. Things became manageable
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I know these fuck it thoughts. They came from another system though. I often thought fuck my diabetes, fuck my sight, fuck neuropathy, fuck kidney failure and many many other side effects. I think it’s way easier said than to suffer from. This is the same with alcohol addition, it’s easy to say fuck it. You are here and you deserve better. The consequences are way worse. We are in this together one day at a time and if that is too long, one hour at a time.
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Hey man, I hear you. You sound defeated and tired of fighting. I’ve been there. Instead of giving up, try surrender first.
Here’s a great thread discussing the topic of surrender.
What does surrender mean to you?
Life is too short to give up, perhaps its time to start trying the things you haven’t tried yet.
- Detox
- Rehab
- AA meetings
- Counseling
- Therapy
- SMART recovery
Help is available! I hope you find what you need. Stay strong, give it time. You’re worth it.
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Don’t give up, Joseph. I know it’s hard but you are stronger than you know!
Just for today, lay your head down sober tonight. 
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A done something really bad yesterday all through alcohol i havent touched drugs in months
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Sorry to hear that, what made you want to drink?
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Remember that alcohol is just a death installment plan. Choosing alcohol is essentially choosing death. That might sound harsh but it’s thoughts like that- hard truth- that save me when I have a fuck it moment. I agree that since you wrote on this forum, maybe there’s a tiny part of your brain, or your soul, that disagrees with ‘fuck it’. You know exactly what will happen if you drink. In a way, doesn’t that make it profoundly boring? Isn’t choosing another way more exciting? Grabbing life? You never know what will happen. I never thought I could get through even a day without alcohol, but it turns out I can. We are stronger than we know. There’s so much help out there if you reach for it.
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@Catmama23 ”death installment plan”. Fantastic analogy.
@Cloyboy89 what happened? You are active here and we want to support you.
To OP, oh my dear friend. I’ve been there like so many others who’ve posted. Do not give up, ever.
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Sounds more like a cry for help. I’ve been there and said the exact same thing. That’s your emotions talking, not your reasoning. Go do something to take your mind off it all, go for a run, take a cold shower, drink a hot coffee then call a friend or hit up a meeting. Sometimes you have to shock your system out of a funk. You hungover? That’s usually the kind of sentiment I have when I’m hungover.
You’ll be alright, nobody can make you want to quit except yourself. And we’re always here when you need. Try thinking of it as less something you have to fight, and more something you have to just let go of. Hope it helps a little, man. Good luck.
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Thats stinking thinking! Your not a slave to alcohol! Its all mental, you may be clinging to old friends or places that are co dependent or triggering. Change your surroundings. Try dealing with stressors in a healthier way, go for a jog or swim. Also realize alcohol is not a treat, it only diminishes your senses and leaves you feeling like shit the next day. I hope you love yourself enough in this life to take care of yourself better than your op leads to believe 
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I agree that this doesn’t sound like you giving up, it sounds like a cry for help. You asked the right people. We have all been where you are, tired, wondering how many times we can make the same mistakes over and over before something finally clicks. This might be the click. I also second the try surrendering before you give up. Your recovery method isn’t working? Pick up someone else’s recovery method instead of picking up. Follow the steps someone else has taken, every single step until they become your own. Turn these defeated feelings into a huge push of determination. It’s all about perspective- is this the moment you fold or fight? You posted here. I think that shows FIGHT.
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You are worth more than to give up…
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This is truth.
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Chose to drink as an easy escape turns out am way more fucked
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Don’t. I am reading in between the lines a bit but I think you want to live. Alcohol means an out of control and messy death, which you also know. Sober is really hard in the beginning. You have to change everything you’ve known. After a while it isn’t so hard.
I’m one year plus sober with the help of this app. Stay with us, use your resources. Put in the hard time now and in a year you will be helping another person like I am trying to do for you. Try one more time.
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Maybe try a meeting might help you wish you well
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Joseph, I hear you. It was about three years before I got sober that I surrendered to that mighty power, alcohol. I made a conscious decision to just drink and see what happens. And for the same reason as you - I was just tired of the fight.
A big part of what I was fighting was the idea of sobriety. I was afraid to try life without booze, even though with booze, I had no life anyway. I was afraid to be sober. I had a blind hope that my drinking wouldn’t continue to harm me, but man oh man it just got worse and worse.
Reflecting on it today, at a definite point in time, I surrendered to sobriety, and took that decision to drink and just see what happened and flipped it to be sober and try to deal with life as it came at me.
I hope that you will not have to endure the long slow decline, the morning shakes, the loss of digestive control, the arrests and broken relationship that I needed to go through. I hope you can make your surrender to sobriety. I made mine 18 years ago and it was rough going at first, but, but, but I found that any state of sobriety is better than any state of active alcoholism. That’s truth as I found it.
Blessings on you 
today and on your journey.
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I can’t take credit for that - I read it somewhere and it’s my mantra when I start going down a wrong way of thinking… a reminder that we’re playing life and death stakes.
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