So, I’ve be sober from alcohol for 76 days, which is amazing for me. I’m a terrible binge drinker. As most binge drinkers, I drank too almost dead. Blackouts, driving drank. Putting lives at danger, because I never had enough alcohol and would keep going back to the store for more. So ashamed, but thankfully never a car accident or DUI. Not sure how I got so lucky.
Anyway, I replaced alcohol with medical marijuana. Last night I, while high, I started feeling really ashamed, as if I was living a lie. I’m not drinking and driving, or any of the other horrendous things I was doing while drunk. But, I do reach for marijuana when cravings for alcohol hit.
It’s legal in my state. I don’t and can’t drive high. I’m fearless while drunk, and don’t think about the well-being of anyone else while drunk. But, I do take those things into consideration while high.
I’m ashamed that I have to have something to self medicate with, I guess.
Has anyone else replaced alcohol with medical marijuana? Am I a hypocrite? It seems to be a better option, but is that just a justification on my part? I know how alcohol and addictive personalities like to justify their actions.
I told myself last night to overcome the alcohol and maybe down the road I can work on the marijuana.
Thoughts?
There is a perspective in the field of addiction treatment that looks for harm reduction, marijuana is less harmful to you and others than drinking was. However, you’re still impairing yourself and experiencing distressing emotions and thoughts while using. I suggest seeking professional help, whether that be counseling or addiction treatment or even just talking to a primary care doctor about what you’ve described and they can help you decide a path forward that works for you. As @Jennajen says, it is your path to choose. I wish you well!
I didn’t really like weed so it’s not an issue I’ve had to deal with. But I did continue to smoke cigarettes when I stopped drinking and considered myself sober, despite clearly being addicted to nicotine. Over time though I came to the conclusion that it seemed a shame to put the work into being alcohol free and still poison myself that way.
I have also occasionally thought about doing things like mushrooms or MDMA, to give myself a little lift. Not things that were problematic for me in the same way as alcohol. Ultimately though I didn’t, because I know my intention behind using those things would conflict with how I feel about my recovery more generally.
I am not passing judgement on your choices - what you count as sober is totally up to you! I would say though that just because a substance is legal and you’re unlikely to kill anyone because of it, while those are good things (!), doesn’t necessarily mean it’s good for you.
I know some people do get benefit from marijuana and its variants, it can be medicinal etc. But for others it is a serious problem and I know there are people on this forum who struggle with it. If and when you think it’s a problem for you then there will be support here to help you address that!
Congratulations on your 76 days with no booze.
I use to be a pot head. If I was awake I was smoking pot. I haven’t smoked weed for a long time. Now that I’m sober and weed is legal in so many places I’m afraid to try it again because like booze I’d be hooked. I’m enjoying being sober so much why would I ruin it by smoking pot?
It is your journey. No judgment here. Hell, I wish I could have a joint once and awhile. But I’m staying off all mood altering drugs because, I feel for me, I’d be right back in the drink as well.
Everyones journey is thier own. Addiction is when life is unmanageable or affecting relationships or life as we know it. Your using it to cope as others may be on prescribed anti depressants, anxiety medication while battling the mental illnesses that we face head on when sober. That choice is yours if it works for you then keep being a better version of you. If it feels like a lie to you. You have the ultimate authority of yourself. Congrats on the month and a half!
Yes, I have bulging disc, from a tear. The only solution is surgery or pain management. I’ve heard surgery may help or it could make it worse. So, at the moment I’m not interested in surgery. I will not take pain pills, I hate how they make me feel. This is how I was approved for medical marijuana.
I am 474 days sober AF, im in Los Angeles,however I smoke medical marijuana THC :cbd blend daily and I have had no problem with relapse. I was heavy hard core drinker, I’m 43 and have been drinking since I was 15. Zero problems. That’s my experience and I have positive results being Cali sober.
Everybody’s journey is different, and you have to find the program that works for you. Your own routine and program to keep you from whatever is burdening your life.
@LEEJR 474 days, that’s so awesome. Thank you for your comment, it’s encouraging. I think I may have gotten a strain that just doesn’t agree with me. I just bought it recently, because they were out of my normal goto. I’m not a daily user, but I certainly use it more since I’ve given up alcohol. Alcohol would have killed me, if I didn’t stop. I feel I made the best choice. But last night was really weird and very uncomfortable. Not something I’ve experienced before.
I have brought this question up before and was given a lot of crap for mentioning it. However I want to express how marijuana has helped me overcome alcohol abuse and addiction, it’s a real thing for me. I’m living proof. Best of luck and congrats.
On whether it’s okay, it’s fine to post about our experience and struggles with substances. What you share is a real dilemma and a possible desire to quit. That’s a good question only you can answer at the end of the day.
Our guidelines do discourage posts encouraging the use of substances. Prescribed is a gray area and brings up a lot of questions worth sharing. As others have said, what causes us problems and what doesn’t?
For what it’s worth, I’m not a fan of the “Cali sober” label as a sober person in California. Though marijuana may be legal here, so is booze. Neither was ever helpful in my personal recovery.
Eke just said what I wanted to say too. I’ve been a heavy smoker since age 14 and been addicted to the stuff for 30 years or so. In the very long run booze took over. But for me marijuana has been my DOC for a very long time and I have been addicted to it for a very long time too. So I would never encourage anybody to take it as a substitute for whatever. But to each their own. It’s your journey.
I Googled sober from alcohol, but using medical marijuana and the label came up. My apologies for offending you, certainly wasn’t my intent. I’d be happy to make the internet change it to Okie Sober, but it would not fit the mix here in Oklahoma, where most are alcoholics or meth addicts, who also use anything they can get their hands on.
Truly sorry to target your state and offend you!
Congratulations on 76 days!! So I am almost 7 months sober and I use medical marijuana. I have used it for a long time in place of other medications. I actually went to a dr today because the anxiety has been too much. She recommended that as long as I continue to use it for medical purposes only, which I do, that it combined with a low dose of anxiety meds would help slow the “crazy” down enough that we can hopefully get to the bottom of it together and maybe someday not need any. But if it helps you and is not in anyway affecting or controlling your life, it’s your recovery. Heal the way works best for you. If you ever want to talk more about it and how it’s been for the last 7 months feel free to message me. I’m more then happy to help if I can.
Actually I don’t get high all the time. I do not use it recreationally. Never have i awoke the next day with a marijuana hangover and called into work. Never have I done it while working. It’s something I do from time to time for pain or anxiety. And after reading both the negative and positive comments I’ve come to the conclusion that it the best option for my situation. Alcoholism was on the verge of killing me. A couple puffs of marijuana is not.
As you can tell, this topic is a rather polarizing one. I just wanted to say you were brave for posting and actively soliciting others opinions and you have handled some of the rather "bristled " responses very well.
And it is your journey, from start to finish. It shows a desire for growth by soliciting the opinions of others and while advice can help show the way, ultimately the direction you pick is up to you
