Hello everyone! My name is Brittany and I’m in recovery. I’ve been sober since September 27, 2021.im new to this App and I’m learning everything about it a little at a time. It’s been a daily struggle for me with temptations and seeing old friends. In sunday.will.be 5 years when my soon to be ex husband proposed to me. He was very abusive and lead me to.the.meth life. I’m just scared I’ll be very over whelmed and depressed it will make me want to go use just so I can numb the pain. Does anybody have any advice they would be willing to give me? Thanks in advance guys.
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Be active here, reach out ask for help. You dont want to use it wont help with the pain. Glad to see you here this is a great community that can offer much help and support.
dont be afraid to ask for help or just someone to talk too.
Welcome to the forum and congratulations on the time you’ve been clean.
You’re request for advice was a little broad for me and I’m not exactly sure where exactly you’re looking for advice, so I will give you a piece of random advice. Be mindful of your thoughts. This is where everything begins. Take very good care of what you are thinking because those thoughts eventually translate into emotions, which in turn gives birth to your actions.
When you notice yourself thinking thoughts like, “I can’t do this” or “I’m horrible” or any other negative thought, challenge that. Try keeping a journal and writing those thoughts down when you notice they’re there, then beside them challenge them as if you were doing so with a good friend. Ask yourself why you think that, or tell yourself that those thoughts are untrue and write why.
Get in a habit of giving yourself mental assistance with good reason. Don’t just try empty affirmations like “I am successful” (as an example), but really consider things you’ve done in the past that support that affirmation. What things have you been successful at in the past, for our example. Let yourself feel successful. And then, allow yourself to feel good about each baby step you take toward your goals–which is proof of why you’re successful, and how you will continue to be successful.
So with your sobriety, don’t let your thoughts nudge you toward using. Your thoughts will also expand your fear, stress, depression, hoplessness, etc. As you think, so you feel, and so you act.
I hope all of that makes sense and that it is useful to you in some way. I wish you the best. This forum has a lot of good information. Make use of the search function. You can do this.
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Welcome Brittany! Sorry, I’m just a little confused by your post. Are you saying you’re worried that the anniversary of the proposal will make you want to use? If yes, I suggest planning ahead to keep yourself busy the entire day with things you like to do. If your day is packed with sober activities, you won’t have idle time to think about the past event. Then wind down with a nice hot bubble bath and go to sleep nice and early. If at anytime the thought starts creeping in, jump on here and start posting about it. We can only help, if we know you’re struggling.
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Welcome! Come on here if u feel triggered on Sunday. But staying clean is the best way to show yourself, ur ex (even if he doesn’t know) and the universe that u have moved on.
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Welcome Brittany.
Congratulations on all that clean time you got going.
This app has been my primary support for my sobriety. Lots of great people around always willing to help out. If you got any questions just ask.
I hope to see you around. Especially on Sunday. Join in when your comfortable.
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heyo ,
well done on your clean date.
if u an addict of the description thats placed in the book , its considerable amount of time in recovery.
“Your BF lead you to meth”
yeah , look with all humility - every drug i tried was introduced to me by somebody close to me
the dubious luxury of holding blane and resentment for me isn’t something i have. i can’t stay sober as u have , for the anount of time you are. i kept picking up when i saw the world around as my justification for my actions.
step 4/5 reintroduced me to the actual problem. blame was a symbol of my solution. quite a paradox.
good effective sponsorship is a sacred relationship. My sponsor can only help me when i reveal everything.
You have made it quite the way thus far, 4 months and a few days, that’s a feat to be proud of in itself.
To be honest what your experiencing is normal, the first year is the hardest, and early memories and anniversaries of difficult events do make it harder, especially the first one.
But you have two options, let it eat you or you can own it like a boss, as time goes on you learn to manage and cope with the feelings better, time doesn’t heal shit, learning how to manage does. You have a great support group here, and there are plenty of outlets to hit up when your struggling, feel free to utilize them
On top of that, make good memories on the days that are triggering or bad,
Sunday is an anniversary of a bad experience. Go to a pottery class and make a terrible ashtray, Super Bowl with friends. Go bowling, learn a new skill or try something new, it keeps your mind off of things, and if you find something you really like you can be like hey I know the day I started that, while uou never forget your past cause it’s full of painful lessons, the pain will fade, the lessons remain, and new beginnings will come
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