# I messed up.... horribly
**URL:** https://talkingsober.com/t/i-messed-up-horribly/158389
**Category:** Relapses
**Created:** [January 23, 2023, 6:03pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/i-messed-up-horribly/158389 "2023-01-23T18:03:48Z")
**Posts on this page:** 14
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@JDillard1994](https://talkingsober.com/u/JDillard1994)
#### Post date: [January 23, 2023, 6:03pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/i-messed-up-horribly/158389/1 "2023-01-23T18:03:48Z")
I was in this app a couple years back. I gave up drinking for awhile. I started again and left. Well… not im back. This past weekend i ruined my life. I was drinking and taking shots. Alcohol took over and my wife got into an arguement. That arguement led to my father in law and i get into a little tussle. At this point, my marriage is practually over, my family is broken and im stuck. I take full responsibility for the next oitcome of my marriage. I cant blame alcohol, i blame myself for picking it up and putting it to my lips, instead of backing down
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### Author:  [@Thirdmonkey](https://talkingsober.com/u/Thirdmonkey)
#### Post date: [January 23, 2023, 6:13pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/i-messed-up-horribly/158389/2 "2023-01-23T18:13:15Z")
Welcome back! Any plans on what you are going to do to enhance your sobriety this time?
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### Author:  [@Phoebe](https://talkingsober.com/u/Phoebe)
#### Post date: [January 23, 2023, 6:13pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/i-messed-up-horribly/158389/3 "2023-01-23T18:13:26Z")
It’s a reset. You can do it. Find a 12 step meeting for your DOC. Some people use Smart Recovery. I’m know you’ll get other suggestions, too.
It’s a daily program. Stick with the winners.
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### Author:  [@meg2](https://talkingsober.com/u/meg2)
#### Post date: [January 23, 2023, 6:13pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/i-messed-up-horribly/158389/4 "2023-01-23T18:13:39Z")
Alcohol will take everything and then come back for you, all you can do is show your wife action instead of words, use this as your rock bottom and the only way is up, show her that you are sorry by actually doing something no matter what it is good luck
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### Author:  [@Ray\_M\_C\_Laren](https://talkingsober.com/u/Ray_M_C_Laren)
#### Post date: [January 23, 2023, 6:48pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/i-messed-up-horribly/158389/5 "2023-01-23T18:48:47Z")
Nothing to loose try ameeting might help you gain wish you well
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### Author:  [@JDillard1994](https://talkingsober.com/u/JDillard1994)
#### Post date: [January 23, 2023, 6:58pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/i-messed-up-horribly/158389/6 "2023-01-23T18:58:39Z")
Just keep my wife and family on my mind. Also get with a couselor, when i get an urge, go walk. Anything to keep my mind busy
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### Author:  [@Nordique](https://talkingsober.com/u/Nordique)
#### Post date: [January 23, 2023, 7:02pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/i-messed-up-horribly/158389/7 "2023-01-23T19:02:30Z")
Welcome back, I’m sorry to hear about what happened but maybe that is the rock bottom you needed to kickstart your sobriety again.
Glad you’re here!
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### Author:  [@LeeHawk](https://talkingsober.com/u/LeeHawk)
#### Post date: [January 23, 2023, 7:09pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/i-messed-up-horribly/158389/8 "2023-01-23T19:09:41Z")
Hey buddy! I’m glad you chose to come back here for support. That’s a bad bottom, but believe it that there are lower bottoms to hit if you don’t get and stay sober. Quitting drinking doesn’t typically last without a complete 180 in lifestyle and lots of support. Glad you came back.
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### Author:  [@EFountains](https://talkingsober.com/u/EFountains)
#### Post date: [January 23, 2023, 7:15pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/i-messed-up-horribly/158389/9 "2023-01-23T19:15:26Z")
Ask for forgiven, again, again, again…and do not drink. If your wife does not forgive you, unless you are sober. Nevertheless I am sure, do not drink could help to fix issues.
Best regards!
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### Author:  [@TryingJoy](https://talkingsober.com/u/TryingJoy)
#### Post date: [January 25, 2023, 2:13pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/i-messed-up-horribly/158389/10 "2023-01-25T14:13:29Z")
> [@JDillard1994](#):
>
> At this point, my marriage is practually over, my family is broken and im stuck.
Only one way out—up. Alcohol isn’t done taking things from you. You’re at a major crossroads here. It’s either alcohol or your family because it looks like the two can’t mix again without major disappointment and consequences. Alcohol doesn’t care what you decide. But your family does. Alcohol doesn’t heal you. But family can. We all say 1 day at a time around here because little increments of massive effort go a long way. Forgiveness works the same way too.
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### Author:  [@emc2018](https://talkingsober.com/u/emc2018)
#### Post date: [January 26, 2023, 12:02am UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/i-messed-up-horribly/158389/12 "2023-01-26T00:02:56Z")
As terrible as it feels, you’ve just been given an opportunity to change your life and learn from this. Use this pain. Be the person you know you can be. Sober life will always equal a better life. Get sober, apologize - without expectations - and just do your best to show the ppl you love that you love them ❤
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### Author:  [@JDillard1994](https://talkingsober.com/u/JDillard1994)
#### Post date: [January 26, 2023, 2:40am UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/i-messed-up-horribly/158389/13 "2023-01-26T02:40:33Z")
I gave it up. Havent thought about a sip or even buying. Just dealing with the withdrawls but im managing. Since ive came back into here, jumped into a support group and joined virtual AA meetings. My wife has came back around and has been a backbone to me
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### Author:  [@LeeHawk](https://talkingsober.com/u/LeeHawk)
#### Post date: [January 26, 2023, 2:42am UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/i-messed-up-horribly/158389/14 "2023-01-26T02:42:00Z")
I am SOOO glad you checked back in. Keep reading The Promises. Sobriety in Recovery is a gift.
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### Author:  [@Gotno](https://talkingsober.com/u/Gotno)
#### Post date: [January 26, 2023, 3:08pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/i-messed-up-horribly/158389/15 "2023-01-26T15:08:18Z")
So glad to hear that your wife is in your corner. Congratulations on the new chapter in your life you get to write!