Im back and motivated but struggling ATM

Relapses
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If you have seen my posts before you know my story. I work on a boat and don’t drink half the month. I go home and battle my demons and I lost this time.

I fell off the wagon at the end of my 2 weeks home and drank for like 3 days straight. Having a hard time dealing with the hangover/withdrawls at work.

Sick and tired of feeling sick and tired. Heres to another go at this. I will hit meetings when I get home but at the moment words of support would help. Just trying to focus on surviving the day/withdrawls. Its tough because I live with my coworkers and it creates a stress and paranoia that they all know.

-Luke

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Good to see you back, sorry about the relapse. Hopefully moving forward with a more solid plan and resolve. :heart:

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Yep. Meetings early and often.

They seem to work best for me. Hate that I keep putting myself through this. One drink seems to be too many for me.

Im an alcoholic.

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Glad to see you. I was thinking about you this morning.

Keep trying. You got this!

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Ill keep coming back as long as I have to.

It hurts to fall down when I think I have a good plan. I have more work to do. Gotta beat this and get back to the life I love. I did meetings all last time I was home and I felt great. My girlfriend was proud and so happy with me. She said it was like getting a whole new me.

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I happy to see you! Alcohol is tricky! I know how easy it is to take that first drink. I’ve done it plenty of times.

:muscle:you got this!

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Yep! I tried moderating but now I’m stranded on withdrawl island.

I need to work on keeping in touch better and not just when I have a crisis. This feeling is rediculous.

Thank you as always for your reliable support. It means more than you know.

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You keep reaching, and you’re gonna get ahold of it pal.

You stay incredibly accountable, you continue to keep coming back, you know what you’re after.

I believe in you bud

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I’ve been there so many times I lost count. And being “sick and tired of being sick and tired” for years feeling hopeless. But the key is I never stopped trying. Even if I fell off for a few months, I’d get back to that point, or worse, and try again even if it only lasted a few days. Doing something different and downloading this app is hopefully my last try. All the support and advice is amazing. I listened to suggestions and finally got to a meeting. Life changer right there. I’ve got 70 days now and I actually like myself again. Working towards loving myself. You can do it too. All the best :grinning:

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Chin up buddy! You got this

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You’re doing great btw, a big inspiration to me…:blush:

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Aww :blush: you’re doing great too!

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Thanks this really helped.

Ive drank about a zillion waters and am inching closer to my first day “back”.

Ill keep reaching. No other option.

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Hey Luke this sounds rough, I’m feeling for you especially with the stress and paranoia part. It would literally eat me up when I was still drinking, it drove me up the walls. I don’t know how much time you have on the boat but I would suggest some meditation, just letting your thought sort of centre and calm, away from the focus on other people. A few minutes unusually do wonders for me.
Have you tried downloading some aa podcastsfor when you are at sea and can’t attend meeting?
I wish you a lot of strenght and hopefully you’ll be able to get some time back unter your belt.

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Ill look for some podcasts. I havent tried that option yet.

Thanks for your message. Still struggling through the old detox.

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Just, ehhh checking in. Hi all.

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Heart has been racing. I have had no appetite. Havent been able to sleep.

I know time will fix and I have been through brutal ones, but words of encouragement or strategies to help are welcome.

Taking b vitamins, milk thistle, multi vite, Kudzu root in Sobrenix. Been pounding water bottles.

I know I need to eat but I cant. Ill try a sandwich again when I get up for work.

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I’m pulling for ya, pal.
Here is a humorous and poignant speaker tape of that helps

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Thanks! Helps to have your support. Everything is a struggle now so seeking tapes seemed like a huge task. This is really nice of you!

Ill listen.

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Let me know what you think of it!