My love with alcohol started when I was very young, my mother allowed me to drink a wine cooler nye 1999. And has followed me into my 30’s. Which also fed into a cocaine addiction as well; I’ve lost countless jobs/pushed loved ones away/ stole / lied / was taking advantage of multiple times by men who could not care less.moved multiple states… the abuse I’ve put myself through is terrifying to look back on and how blind I was. And how simple it is fall back into.
I haven’t told anyone this ever I’ve just kept it in and sometimes hinted towards it when drunk.
Im planning on telling a therapist this this week and im kind of using this platform as a warm up as my feelings are deep but it’s hard for me to talk about.
This isn’t my first time in recovery or on this site but I feel like I haven’t given it my all so here goes nothing.
Trying harder is a good idea. Telling your therapist is a good idea. Opening up and facing up to your pains and shames is a very good idea. This is how it’s done. This kinda work over a long time is what gets and keeps ppl sober.
Adding to that I would suggest recovery content and immersion in the community here as much as you can.
My fav podcasts early on was the Recovery Elevator.
Maybe change your profile name into doing it
Sorry…just had to say it
I do not want to make fun of you, I know how hard it is to quit and stay that way.
And yes, it’s a mindset. So that’s why I noticed your profile name. By trying it you keep a space left for failure.
Good of you to give it you’re all this time, you need that for sure. Be here much! I’m here each day and sober for years.
I wish you the same.