So lets start from the beginning since I’m new here. Hey, Im Skye, 16 years old. Its been a good life till what seemed like back in 6 grade. I started taking Advil, simple over the counter stuff. Don’t know why I kept taking them, I just did. It’s not like I took too much, just like 5-15 each day. After like 4 months I stopped. Clean for 2 months, then after that, I started doing it again. Then I stopped again after a few more months. I thought it stopped there, thought finally those pill taking stopped there.
It’s was a long time I was a clean. Like, maybe an year? I don’t really remember. Then I found about TraMADol HCL in late 7th grade years. My dad had them in the medicine cabinet. They’re considered synthetic opiods I heard. I took the to my room, maybe like 15 of them. Then I took 11 of those at night. I didn’t really knew what they’ll do to me and thought they wouldn’t really have much effect. I was wrong. About 30 minutes later, I started having trouble breathing, my vision was getting a bit blurry. It seemed to be calming down after an hour. I just feel weird, maybe a little trouble breathing but not really. I thought eveyrhing was going to be alright. When I woke up, my hands couldn’t stop twitching and I couldn’t walk that well. I threw up after trying to eat since my mom doesn’t know about this and gave me breakfast. She thought I was just sick, because I was faking it well. Well enough. After a week I was fine. A week of being sober. Then I started doing them again. Every two days, I would take 4 or 5.
Then at some point a year after that, I decided to stop. I decide to stop this mess. And I actually did. Threw away the pills for good. Ah, it was a good full year I was clean, 2 years.Then hear is right now. I’m in high school now, 10th grade. I got introduced to vyvanse. At first told myself that I shouldn’t be doing this. But I fell for it. Started taking them. Then I ran out. What now? I started stealing a bit, a bottle of cough syrup. Nah, then I took those night time pills. I don’t really feel like taking them again, but idk. It’s hard. Still wanting vyvanse or tramadol HCL. I have to go through this sort of alone because my parents will only get mad at me and yell at me. When that found out that I self harmed, they only got mad and yelled in my face. I wish there was some way where I can secretly get help or something. Until then, I’m still trying to stop. Trying my best to stop. I hope eventually I will.
Hey Skye! Things are a lot tougher for your generation then it was for mine with a lot more pressures and sometimes even the best and well-meaning parents forget that. I cant even fathom what it must be like growing up in the age of social media, cyber bullying and metal detectors at school. The stress young people are faced with today is intense and often more so than that of us twice your age.
You have help and support here and feel free to message me anytime you feel the overwhelming need to self harm. Take it from someone who started at 16, you’ll give yourself the gift of LIFE if you can overcome this NOW. I’ve drank and pill popped for more than your lifetime and it gets harder the older you get. It’s hard at first, but it’s worth the effort.
What those pills do to your insides, your liver, your brain, your cells… STOP now! You are bathing yourself in toxins that will morph into disease.
Hit me up anytime @ConfettiGhost and lets start vitamin popping some good things instead, like B vitamins and bioastin to start repairing any damage done. Your young and you will bounce back quick. I’ll be happy to send you whatever you need to begin your journey! If I was brave and strong enough to do what your doing at 16, I wouldve gained a lifetime.
All of my love and HUGS young friend… you CAN do this!
@Naturehippy
Thanks for the support 
btw, I’m wondering how you can message people on here? Still trying to get around here.