I try to pick up hobbies and projects and continuously fail. I’ve got no reason to do more than go to work, do the bare minimum, come home and veg out. One of the reasons I’ve had such trouble with alcohol is it helps fill the void and forget for a while you’re not accomplishing anything.
I’ve been practicing gratitude for what I have but something is always missing.
I’m really jealous of people with hobbies. Part of me doesn’t see the point and gives up very easily. Maybe it’s okay to just be but I feel like being sober requires continuous self improvement.
I find hobbies don’t satisfy me. I seek passions. I used to wood work, tinker with bikes, and still garden. But a passion is different, at least for me, because there are quantifiable goals associated. I wanted to earn a black belt, and am now a year away from earning two. Martial arts has become my passion. I wanted to raise a bunch of money for diabetes and cancer through long distance cycling. For two years, riding became my passion. In 2021, my whole family is going to Okinawa. Next year I will begin Japanese studies.
An activity that just fills the void, won’t fill it, but with a passion there’s never enough time and energy to match what you’d like to spend, so you spend all you can.
If you’re lacking motivation I would suggest to be slightly better than you were yesterday.
Dont have “the time”, or “the energy” to go for a jog? Get your shoes on and walk to the end of your block and back. That will take you 1 minute. Surely you can do that.
Change starts with small steps. You don’t need to save the world today, just be a little bit better than you were yesterday.
I know exactly how you feel. My motivation is very rare and it doesn’t happen often no matter how much I want it. I’ve been sober off opioids for over a yr and I’m trying but my loneliness and depression make it very hard
All a process hun. I found it so difficult. I have experienced this exact same thing. Almost like weaning off…this self hatred and diminished capacity for creativity. Keep working through, practice and be patient with your self. You are so resilient. You have come so far. Remember you aren’t alone.
Thank you. It’s just really hard when I don’t have anyone to talk to. I have no friends anymore and I have a rough time meeting new people bc I don’t do much. It’s like a revolving door
It’s the goal and the striving. If you aim at nothing, you will hit nothing everytime. I once was asked to participate in an event to benefit woman’s transitional housing, that involved getting people to sponsor me for each lap I swam in a pool on event day. I committed to swimming 10,000 meters. First I started to train, then it became a passion. In 6 months I probably swam a couple hundred thousand meters. I watched videos on improvement of my stroke, and different drills to build endurance. I filmed myself to analyze where I was sloppy. And when the day came, I swam it…4 hrs 26 minutes, just pausing for water.
What I am saying is pick something you’ve always wanted to accomplish, make it a challenge. Tell everyone you are going to do it. Not for bragging. For accountability. Make it something laudable, that really makes you better, or the lives of others better. Then get after it!
For me, I went back to things I enjoyed way before I was drinking. As a kid I loved watching ballet and other forms of dance. I loved theater. Now I go to see live theater and dance all the time. It’s beautiful to watch (when it’s done well) and it fills my head with images and ideas I can call on when I’m not in beautiful places (like on the subway).
I also started writing. It took a while and then I entered a few fiction contests and joined a writing group and am now regularly writing— with a view to getting published: a dream of mine.
I also cut down on a lot of the fillers: like crappy tv. I read again. I’ve learned a new appreciation for classical music instead of watching marathon episodes of the real housewives.
And I move: walk and/ or run 8 to 10 miles a day. Get the blood flowing and muscles moving. Just feels good. So much better than my slothlike existence when I was drinking.
Correct my friend. This is exactly what it means.
Start slowly.
I have loads to do but not enough time and then I find myself not doing anything because I don’t know what I want to do. Aarrrhhh!
I’ve still got work to do!
Today is that for me. Self improvement - do I wallow in self hatred today? I am pissed at the world. Yet I created my world. Want change…be the change. Take the initiative. Yep. Eating my own words right now.
The day I wake up perfect will be the day I judge others but you seem very different from me and this is a good thing as we are all individuals but please help me to understand you. I get spending large amounts of money on luxury items is a problem but what goes through your mind to erk you when paying for travel and cabs. Not trying to offend just want to understand then maybe one day I will have some advice for like minded people.
We are here, well sort of of I got to go out now but you know what I mean. BTW your photography is beautiful, you have a real talent there and should concentrate on that when you are low. There is nothing more beautiful than YOU and nature.
