Well ive been to the dentist got anti biotic and 4 follow up appointments so at least thats sorted out ,as for work i pulled out my contact and i am still in my probationary period so no sick pay being in the situation im in ive decided to go back in on the Wednesday for the 2 scheduled n/s ,what i am angry about is the lack of contact from my work ,since i told the supervisor about my addiction which was a very hard thing to do ,im now regretting it ,ive called the office to be told contact your manager, i have twice and still no reply, some people are so #ucking rude ,id never do that to anyone, i dont know if anyone else has experienced this but alcohol makes me weak mentally, but what ive been through has mad me a far stronger person than i ever was more confident and i dont like that kind of shit ,so now i will turn up on Wednesday am i on the rota or not who knows but the lack of contact i find shocking, hopefully i can hang in there and find a better job soon one more suited to me as i find n/s bad as i cant sleep, i done it one 30 years ago for a period of time ,i didnt think it would be so bad but trying to find a 9 to 5 nowadays is near impossible everything is 24/7 also i need to work round my 2 wee dogs ,anyway i think this is what i need talk instead of just reading it helps having a wee vent now and again
Yes keep talking Maggie its gotta come out, i would still speak with the dr and citizens advice…find out the possibilities to help you if you do get sacked and what help/benefits are available if you do need to be on sick from the state for alcoholism until you get sorted out, there is help available i think
I found this aswell…[Withdrawn] Universal Credit: support if you are dependent on drugs or alcohol - GOV.UK
If you click on the first pdf it does explain that you are able to go onto universal credit for 6 months if you are dependent on alcohol but you must be getting help. Im not advocating you quit work but its an option to look into should you need it.
Thankyou kelly for all your help you have been so good it was really what ive needed the last few days and making me aware of the uc stuff i didn’t know about that and i will keep it in mind ,i did call the doctor ive a phone apt next Friday the receptionist was more help ,but i will keep all you have told me as my backup plan ,ive got to face the music at work see what happens, get myself bck to were i had been ,god it is true about everything they say it gets so much worse everytime i go bck the way ,i want to keep going forward i know i can do it ,just next time instead of just reading and liking im going to post
Yes its hard and yes we gotta face the music but you do not have to do that alone Maggie, someone once said to me that the opposite to addiction is connection so stay connected…when your not good mentally there will be things that can help that youve not thought of and thats where we come in, we all need each each other here and it also helps me to help you, i might need you sometimes…its what we do! So be more present here
And that’s a for sure stay connected on here, we all need each other and knowing we arnt alone really helps love sent 
How are you Maggie?xx
Hi kelly ,im ok ,getting there just taking longer than normal this time around, im really bothered about telling my work ,i dont know if it was such a good idea but at the time i was in a really bad place i wasnt thinking straight, now i have to go bck on Wednesday but i cant turn bck time ,so i will have to face the music ,my sleeping was really bad so i got some sleeping tablets they have been helping and i have been keeping myself busy out walking my 2 dogs with my pal ,also im getting out ,my aunt whos 81 ,her wee cat died last night so i buried her out her bck for her got her messages ,got myself trainers before i spent all my birthday money on bills and im just being with family not isolating myself, how are you ,having a good day xx
That all sounds really good, so happy your getting out and being around people, your doing great. I know your not looking forward to Wednesday but theres none of us in this world perfect, you have an illness and if people dont understand that then thats up to them, cast the first stone n all that! all you can do is focus on you and lean on those who do understand which is what it sounds like your doing, il be here if you need a friend,anytime. Im doing good thank you 
sending hugs 
Is it nightshift tomorrow Maggie? Hope your ok xx
Yeah kelly ,tomorrow and Thursday, i am worried about it but theres not much i can do except wait to get it over with ,if anything is going to be said to me it will probably be next week when im mon to Thursday as the management is in then ,its the waiting thats the killer, been keeping myself busy and in company all day ,im just so disappointed that ive put myself in this position
Itl be ok Maggie ul get through it youve gotten through alot worse and are made of tough stuff, dont be beating yourself up whats done is done theres none of us perfect thats for sure so be kind to yourself ok, sending love and hugs 
Il be thinking of you tonight Maggie, here if u need a friend. Hope it all goes ok, you can do it xx
How did it go Maggie?xx
On a wee 5 min break, nothing, but i think if anyone is going to say anything it will be next week when im on dayshift, in a way i just want it over and done with, good thing is though I’m feeling more or less back to normal
Hi Macy hope your keeping well
Hows things going Maggie?xx
First day shift this morning, im feeling better ,more or less bck to myself, 4 shifts then im off for 10 days ,just what i need
Brilliant your doing great, i hope today goes ok for u xx
You go girl strength sent to you
@Macy2020 all my love and respect for your journey. This way is not easy and you did a lot. You don’t start from square one, no, you have a lot of experience. Use it and don’t give up