Long time since I’ve been here. Almost a year, and it coincides to when I started a new relationship. I thought I was doing ok with my alcool consumption. So busy with academic life and sports competition, I didn’t have time to drink. My girlfriend in medical work, I was following a fast going pace of living. But then I fucked up.
I lost it couple times blacking out for no reasons. First time in a year my GF is crying is because of me drinking. First time she’s sad is because of my drinking. So I said and thought I’d stop. I wrote myself a letter.
But then I drank again. Lied to myself, family, friends and girlfriend.
So after 3-4 days of drinking in the back of everybody, my GF found out I wasn’t myself and found out I was drunk while driving.
She went to work today, and I went back to buy couple of beers to get through the day,
Don’t know what to do anymore.
Can’t control myself.
Drank in the back of my people for the first time clearly, and got cut; and still went back to it.
Can’t get off of it and lies.
Help needed.
But I don’t know what I’m able to do to help myself. I feel like I can’t trust myself.
I’m just drinking because I don’t know what else to do that’s so easy.
Thanks for reading,
David
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