What do you guys think about that? I, personally, don’t have physical cravings and urge to drink and no signs of abstinence but every situation that triggers my social anxiety/fobia would result with drinking (to feel more comfortable). I know I am an alcoholic anyways. This lasts for 2-3 years, it got sooo much worse since I gave birth last year.
I am on meds, for depression and anxiety, but do you have suggestions of any type of excercises for mental growth, self love and self respect? I could use them now when I feel like and people around me are just… ‘she isn’t strong enough’. Hell I am folks and I’m asking for advices, you beautiful, wise, strong and sober people! Xoxo, I.
I know exactly what you mean. I’m supposed to be on Naltrexone for cravings, but it isn’t physical, so they don’t help. I have terrible anxiety and sometimes I feel like I want to scream or cry for no reason.
I wish I had some advice for you, but all I can tell you is that you’re not alone. Hang in there!
@iva@DryIn785 I also am not a physically dependent alcoholic . It definitely stems from anxiety and lack of self worth and respect. One thing I can tell you for sure is that alcohol definitely increases your anxiety massively then you drink to numb the anxiety and the next day it is 10 times worse. It becomes a vicious circle and takes work and perseverance to break but I definitely can be done and the longer you are off the drink the less anxiety you will feel. With regards to personal growth and self respect there are so so many ways to work on that. I personally have found meditating, doing morning affirmations and prayer to have a great impact on my outlook and self belief. You don’t have to follow a particular faith to pray. I personally am spiritual rather than religious. There are so many books also that can help with your growth and techniques you can learn for grounding and coping in certain life situations. I find YouTube and google will help with this if you know what you personally are looking for. I’m now 4 months sober so still fairly early days but I feel like a completely different person and my anxiety is definitely at an all time low most days. I wish you the best of luck on this personal journey and there are many more people on here with much more sobriety than me who can offer you great advice… take it… try it all and find what fits, but don’t ever give up. Blessings to you
Unfortunately, I’m not that way; alcohol helps my anxiety. Way too much. If the house was burning to the ground, I’d look around and think, “I’m totally cool with this!”
That’s why it’s so hard to quit. None of my medications are helping with the anxiety.
As for my self-worth, that’s a lost cause. If
I never touch alcohol again, I’m still going to be short, fat, and ugly.
That’s the hardest thing for most alcoholics. Anybody can sober up and physical withdrawal passes. It’s getting rid of the mental obsession which is the hardest thing
I’m nearly 50 and getting less hair, more wrinkles, I’ve swapped my beer belly for a chocolate belly, I’m partially sighted and sqint at everyone, I’ve got something odd happening to my hand and it’s only half open and half my teeth have fell out. But I am sober proud and happy, I don’t have to look like an adonis just to be pleasing on the eye to make other people happy, I don’t have to change this or that to gain the approval of others. The only reason I would need to be perfect would be if I gave a shit what people thought of me and even then someone would be offended by how marvellous I was. So be short fat and ugly but be you, be sober and grateful, your enough just how you are.
I understand that alcohol helps with the anxiety while you’re drinking but it’s the day after that the anxiety kicks in and a lot of that is caused by the continual drinking and alcohol in our system, at least that’s my experience. Just keep trying to find the support that fits for you
Yoda-Stevie posts about the mental side of sobriety quite a bit. Here’s one of his threads on it:
You’re absolutely right: once the early physical withdrawals are gone, sobriety is 100% mental. Keep searching - never give up. You will find what you need
Check out Brene Brown. Her book Gifts of Imperfection was very enlightening. And many people feel like you. Once you get the confidence to even slightly talk about it with others, you often find people say “Me too!” And realising you are not alone is very comforting and strengthening. Certainly getting sober has helped a lot with self-respect and self-acceptance. I
Thanks! I try to have a positive self-image because I really am a great guy. But it can be hard living in a society that values physical appearance above everything else. Men can have body image issues too.
I was a binge drinker so not physically dependent, but like @DarrenUK says once people have gone through the withdrawal (not trying to minimise this, it sounds awful) the challenges of staying sober are similar for everyone.
I found that using this forum as a recovery network, having people whose experience I can learn from and who can understand the things I am struggling with, has been a massive help. Over time, more mental health stuff has emerged and I have also recently been attending Recovery Dharma meetings, as I find Buddhist principles helpful and interesting. I’ve done lots of walking, yoga and meditation. I’ve improved my diet. I’ve backslided on all these things a lot too! I’ve tried some medication and some CBT. They have all played a part in getting me to a place where I feel more able to face my insecurities. It’s a process, and one that I think I will be working on for as long as I’m willing to invest my time and evergy into it.
It takes time and experience to undo that conditioning of reaching for a substance to ‘help’ deal with the situations we find difficult. To learn how to feel our emotions and live life on life’s terms. What this looks like in practice will be different for all of us but developing acceptance and compassion for ourselves as we are seem to be a common theme for most people.
Links to a few collections of threads by some general wellness tags which might be helpful. There is a lot of cross over but sharing them all cos there’s some really great wholesome stuff there!
This lasts for 2-3 years, it got sooo much worse since I gave birth last year.
and people around me are just… ‘she isn’t strong enough’. Hell I am folks and I’m asking for advices, you beautiful, wise, strong and sober people! Xoxo, I.
