My birthday is coming up soon

Emotional Support
1

Trigger warning: mentions of abuse and trauma

So my birthday is coming up next week, and i am not looking forward to it. The weeks leading up to my birthday is when a lot of the abuse started. It was an awful time and i was so so scared, i was just a kid. I didnt know what was happening back then. I didnt know it was abuse, i thought I deserved it all.

She beat me a lot. I was bleeding and sobbing and so so scared. That was also when i had my first drink, she just wanted me to stop crying. There was so much shit that happened.

She bought me lots of things for that birthday. It was bittersweet. Im trying to focus on anything else rn but its so hard. Life has been rough lately im so ready for a break

2

Firstly, I’m sorry that all of that happened to you. Hurt people have a tendency to hurt people. You didn’t do anything to deserve that sort of treatment.

I assume you’re talking about your mom?

Have you been seeing anyone to help you process all of that? We’re an assembly of addicts who can help you find resources and point you in a good direction once in a while. There’s also a lot of folks who can help with types of therapy that they’ve been using to process their traumas. However, I’m afraid that this is going to be an obstacle to your recovery that might need more expertise than we can provide.

Here to listen if you need to talk.

2 Likes
4

I’m sorry to hear this. Breaks my heart! I would seek counseling to help overcome the past trauma and stay strong by staying away from your addictions. We are here for you when, you need to share. Sending healing vibes your way.

1 Like
5

No i had this babysitter that was super abusive. My mom is nowhere near as bad as that

2 Likes
6

Btw everyone I do have a therapist but i see her again next week so im just venting here for a lil bit

1 Like
8

Jay hi first and foremost,the courage to share such a emensley tramatizing part of your childhood is a NODD to you and your courage and faith, remember your still here sharing your pain so I commend you for that.do you share you past with Dr or thearpy ppl if so how’s it helped you in the past ,if not maybe look into that, please remember you are strong ,you are worth loads of self worth,maybe hook up with sober close friends and family and do something totally different like a road trip anything but sitting with that little lost boy.please stick around this community can help in the most darkest of days and be there for when the sun is shining aswell.xx

3 Likes
9

My appointment went well. We discussed some of my memories that have been coming up lately and how to cope with them so that was nice

3 Likes