My birthday tomorrow

Tomorrow is my birthday and I’m not only scared to relapse but you see people that make me want to relapse. I have plans to go to the movies with my son and my family and hoping that afterwards I can control myself into staying home. I just know that somebody somewhere will text me and try to trigger me going out with them on my birthday. But I’m hoping to God that I can keep myself together hold on tight and stay in line for my family my children and my friends. It’s hard for me to not think about coke daily. And even harder bc I would love to just have a glass of wine with some one but I can’t. It triggers the want and need for cocaine. :broken_heart::sob::weary::pleading_face:

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That’s a hard space to be in - it’s hard in those early days. :sob:

Can you change your route? leave your phone at home? No one texts you that way.

Can you have an escape plan? Bring a sober friend with you to the movies?

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I am going to try! I have no sober friends… so that sucks

That negative thinking is not helping you at all. The relapse starts before the actual relapse happens and it sounds like it’s already in motion. Turn off your phone when you get home and take advantage of that time to celebrate with your children. You don’t want your kids’ memory of your birthday to be that mom went out partying all night. Believe me, I let my child down on many holidays and birthdays because of my use. We’ve been given a second chance to make beautiful memories with our kids and we need to take advantage of it.

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Turn your phone off , ive got hundreds maybe thousands of sober friends some i havnt met yet ,maybe try a meeting they helped me wish you well

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Sounds like a solid plan. And just think, won’t it be lovely to wake up sober and fresh for more moments like these in the morning?

Spend that evening cuddling the kiddo and count them sober blessings! A great start for a new year.

As for the friends, can just turn off the phone or say, thank you so much, but I’d really like to just spend my birthday with my boy tonight. Nuff said.

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