Long story short, my friends drink while I don’t want to. I tell them I don’t want to, they know my history, but they give me alcohol and I can never say no.
I’ve also told them if I ask, they should not buy alcohol for me.(I can drink legally but not buy legally in stores, only at pubs and so on, swedish)
I’ve told them I don’t want to drink.
But I still end up drinking with them.
Plus my boyfriends mother, and my mother wants me to drink wine with them more often now which makes me want to go out to the pub. My problem is that I just can’t say no??? I do want to go to parties but staying sober, although atm it feels pretty much impossible.
Seriously as I’ve been writing this my Bfs mom already poured me a glass of wine, great fkn Friday. </3
Been drinking since i was 14, my closest family are alcoholics in denial except for my bf. It’s everywhere around me. I don’t know how to do this.
Hello @Siare! First off, I’m glad you’re here looking for support! It’s a great place to start.
Secondly, as far as your friends go giving/buying you alcohol, it’s going to take a firm “no” from you, and if it doesn’t stop, perhaps spending some time away from them would do you good.
I also have very lively in-laws who enjoy drinking. In the past, I’ve given in to their offerings even if I had decided to give it a rest for awhile. If this is something you really want to do, and I’m assuming it is, then you are going to have to be firm with them about what it is you need. Have a serious conversation with them about your desire to stop drinking, and tell them that they need to respect your wishes. It’s hard, trust me I know this, but so worth it in the long run!
Hi, I really agree with @kpear826 you need to be really strong with your friends and family. We are all here as a huge support for you. I do prefer honesty but maybe if they are not taking you seriously a white lie may help, I have a friend who used to always drink but she stopped drinking altogether saying that even one or two drinks was causing her really bad stomach problems, after her saying that nobody questioned her or tried to encourage her to drink!
just be confident in your decision and know that without drinking you will be much better off in the long run. Its like a long term investment in youself the sooner you stop the better off you will be.
Are you tempted and give in because you feel you are missing out or because of the social pressure or both???
Whatever it is try to find specific forums about how to help you and also glad you are here. Your life will be alot better if you stick with your decision. Trust me I know drank for 11 years and been sober for 74 days and feel great.
A lot of social pressure here to go out “to watch the game” this evening. I’ve been declining drinking invites for 26 days so far, but also isolating due to this which isn’t optimal. I’m tempted to see people/hang out, but am not interested in drinking. Everyone I know except my Mom and sister drink, well except people at the gym. I feel bad turning certain people down because they will probably think I don’t like them which isn’t true. Finding it hard this time, but am not interested in going to a certain establishment anyhow.
@Siare Think about it this way - if someone offers you alcohol and you say no, then drink some in a little bit anyway, people are going to think you just need some extra convincing.
When I was drinking, I was pushy and suspicious of those that didn’t drink with me. As if they were committing some sin for not joining me. I wanted them to drink and party with me. No one wants to drink alone when surrounded by a bunch of people.
I say this because I get where they’re coming from, I once (and really not that long ago) had that same mentality. “You don’t want to drink, wth is wrong with you?” You need to be firm and 100% believe yourself when you say you don’t want a drink.
No one can make you take that first sip but you. No one can force you to drink, remember that!!
people initially want a drinking partner and will apply pressure. If not successful they will get over it and drink in any case, as that’s what they want to do. They actually don’t give a damn if you drink or not and if you succumb to their pressure you could possibly just be looking for an excuse to drink
