@Looking4Support no I don’t know how to make one but I do want to start some counseling sessions very soon and I am looking for a job so I can be able to support us. I have an idea it’s just being able to put it all into place and see it through. I also have to make sure I’m strong enough to follow through in my decision and not let him manipulate and gaslight me like he did before. I want to make sure I have everything set up before I do anything and that includes a home, job, car, and anything rose I need to make a smooth transition.
I’m American I’m in Florida. I have insurance so I know I can get counseling with no issues. I just have to take the time to find someone who I like and who is in my network.
Alright everyone so this week and last was sooo durn hectic omg. I didn’t focus on cleaning or cooking and strictly focused on my kids hair. If you know anything about braiding and beading then you know it is a long long task that can take some time especially when you don’t have help or are not trained to really do hair. Anyway I started mid last week by taking their hair down which was a task all in itself because my kids don’t like to stay still. It ended up taking us about 3 days to get their hair down, then I had to wash and condition and all that fun stuff, and finally I had to start on their new style. Now normally I let their hair rest in between these type of styles but they wanted to get their new glow in the dark beads in their head for Halloween. I well pulled all the way up until it was time to get ready and go truck or treating yesterday and I still did not finish their hair. I ended up getting the front done and pulled the back into a ponytail but in the end they were soooooo cute:
We had so much fun last night and now that Halloween is over now i have to give my home a complete overhaul and clean it up.
Other than that I’m still going strong I’m over 40 days sober and counting.
Things are still more of the same with my husband but I’m not putting much energy into him at the moment…. I chose to also stand my ground when it comes to sex because after that last time I felt disgusted with myself for doing something I didn’t want to do to satisfy him when he does nothing to make me happy so we haven’t has sex since and I don’t plan on changing that either until he does better. He has asked and I’ve told him no or that I’m not in the mood or that I’m tired and I can tell he gets upset every time I say no but he doesn’t say anything and until he does that’s on him.
So great to hear from you Danielle
OMG girl you did a fantastic job on the hair - girls look amazing! love the pictures - your smile is gorgeous
I am glad that you all had a Happy Halloween and girls got to show off their glow in the dark beads.
40+ days – girl you are crushing it! I love this for you So grateful that you are sticking to your guns and creating a healthy boundary for yourself. You are right - No rewards for someone who does not take time to make you happy and if your husband does not take the time to talk it out then it is on him.
Congratulations @Daniellegurl for all your sober days! Yay! Nice to be sober for these precious days with your precious children … and with your own self!!
Proud of you!
So glad to hear from you Danielle and seeing you so happy with your girls
Congratulations on every single day and on every step you take
Go for it girl, you deserve it
Hi everyone so while I was cooking a little while ago my husband and kids were in the kitchen with me and my 4 year old asked my husband to pick her up and he was like “no my knees hurt” and the way he said it was harsh so my daughter went to the living room and sat in the floor sad. I tried to explain to him that she doesn’t understand that and sometimes it’s not what you say it’s how you say it. Her instantly got mad as always saying he is a guy so his tone is different and I’m always getting on him and he didn’t do anything wrong. I was not trying to argue in front of the kids but I told him that he never wants to hear anything and don’t think He ever do anything wrong and I was just trying to help him see how his tone sounds harsh. We have a camera in our kitchen so I told him to look at the video and he will see what I’m saying and he just exploded and yelling and I’i was but yelling I was talking calmly because the kids were here and they started yelling for us to stop arguing and kept saying stop then he yelled at my oldest telling her to stop yelling while he talking to me and I told him see that right there you didn’t have to yell at her. So I just stopped talking and let him talk and tended to the kids to get them eating. I then told him that I can’t wait to find a job because this is not a relationship and I’m over it. He started going on about how did it get to this point when we wasn’t even talking about the relationship. I just ignored him as he talked and told him I’m going to take my kids out so he can get his space since his knees hurt. He got mad and hasn’t said anything else. He is outside with the kids and I’m standing in the kitchen eating apple pie and drinking aloe juice typing this. I’m going to try to see if I can download the video and maybe y’all can tell me if I overreacted with how he spoke to the kids. But either way I’m over it. Sorry for this sad update.
Also 46 days and counting but off I could drink I think I may need one today smh but I’m not going to do it
I’m sorry for the way your relationship is going but one thing you don’t need is a drink. Not just now but not anytime. You need your head clear so you can do what is best for you and your children. As you are right now. Proud of you Danielle. Proud for your 46 days and proud for how you are handling this situation, with dignity and sanity and wisdom. Keep going. Big hugs.
Hey beautiful lady
How are you doing? Been a while since I’ve heard from you… much love my friend
Just want to check on you How are you doing? Can we support you here? ODAAT
Happy these forums exist. I hope it’s as helpful for us new here as it has seemed for lots of others. That is encouraging.
How are you doing Danielle
Hey everyone I’m sorry I’ve been MIA I’ve been so busy these past couple weeks. So updates:
-The girls are doing amazing of course and growing everyday!!!
-We got a dog!!! The kids wanted a dog so bad so past weekend we went to the different adoption events and centers and found Dolly. Granted she is a very sweet dog but not the kind of dog I wanted but mostly my husband wanted her and convinced the girls they wanted her as well so we have a Pitt bull terrier. I wanted a small dog and so did the girls and no offense to Pittbull lovers, I just don’t trust them because I’ve heard of too many horror stories. But so far she is doing good the only issue she is very skittish and I think she may have been abused in her old home so it’s taking a lot of TLC to get her comfortable. One day she seems like she is opening up and playing more then the next she is skittish and to herself. The girls are very active and just want to play with her all the time so it’s been tough to keep them away from her many times because I don’t want anything to happen. The dog hasn’t shown any aggression at all but I know pitts can turn at any minute so it’s tough. We have her for a two week trial to make sure she Is a good fit so we will see I guess.
-I’m at 1 month and 30 days sober and it’s been good. I still have my days where I want a drink but it’s not often at all and I have no problem passing those thoughts to the back of my head.
- My husband it’s more of the same basically I’m just going through the days and trying not to be around him too much and keeping the kids away from him as much as possible. He mostly just works and sleep so I’m not complaining I guess.
So this is a picture of me from last Saturday and I am so happy with my look!!! I did my own hair for the first time because before I was not putting any effort in my looks. In the past I use to be so vain and I use to love mirrors. I have mirrors all over my home because of that reason. However I’ve been avoiding mirrors and I haven’t bought any new makeup in forever. I think I just gave up on myself. About two weeks ago I decided I wanted to take care of myself so I looked online for ideas for my hair because I don’t know how to do hair at all and I found an easy style I could do myself and because I’m so extra I went a little further and it turned out really cute as you can see. I’ve been putting on makeup again and I actually feel pretty again for the first time in so long with or without makeup. I’m still getting used to looking in the mirror again but the fact that I can do it is amazing. I’m always thinking about how I’m going to do my hair again in a few weeks. My clothes are still getting bigger on me and because I’m not drinking my feet aren’t getting swollen anymore so I can actually wear my regular shoes and boots again but I’m still not ready to buy new clothes or shoes just yet because I’m still losing weight so I want to wait until I get to a comfortable size so when I do go shopping I won’t feel bad when trying on clothes like I did before. Over all I’m happy with mostly everything but I’m still looking into different job opportunities and I’m thinking about taking tax and real estate classes if I can work out the timing.
Thank y’all for checking on me I’m going to work on updating more it’s just not enough hours in the day to be honest smh. How is everyone else doing???
Hey danielle i think we all get to that point years ago i love gardening i would be drinking and doing anything in my yard the alcohol eventually took over and i would just sit out there and drink and do nothing so had to stop. YOU CAN DO THIS ALWAYS SUPPORT HERE IF U NEED IT. YOU GOT THIS:+1:
Lovely to hear from you Danielle
Wow- great job on your sober time! You are crushing it
A pitt bull? Wow! Great that you have the trial period to see if you are a good fit for each other.
You are rocking that look!!! Must have taken a long time. Love hearing that you are getting back into self love and care
It’s great to hear from you Danielle and you look stunning.
And 2 month sober!!! How does that sound? Amazing! Great job!
Well I’ve got mixed feelings about the Pitbull too but it’s good to hear you’ve got that trial period. Please be honest with yourself as a family whether the dog fits into your family or not.
Anyway it’s always great hearing from you Danielle.
Wishing you well and don’t give up the good work