My life then and now

I remember living in a shed, sleeping on chairs and using my backpack as a pillow… thinking I’m still ok because at least I got a roof over my head. Not eating, not sleeping, not showering, not brushing my teeth. But yeah I’m good, pushing everybody away, lonely in a crowd of people, no idea who I am and wearing a mask around different people and being a chameleon. Changing the way I acted around different people and not being able to be myself because I had no idea who I was as a person, I was so lost and broken. Today I am 2 months sober and part of a recovery home and on a path to finding myself and gaining self worth by helping out my fellow alcoholic on a daily basis because today I know I can’t do this alone. I am a relapser and this is my second shot at recovery, YOU can do this! And YOU are worth it! Give 100% and get back 110%, today I think about my loved ones before I make any big decision and today I don’t make decisions alone because the decisions I made are what lead me to almost dieing multiple times. I shouldn’t be alive and it is truly a miracle how I am here sharing this message with you all. I believe God said it wasn’t my time to go, and there was a point where I resented God, and said on my way to hell I would rip him off that cross and bring him with me. I was filled with so much hate, today I am learning how to love and mkt be so selfish. This way of life is incredible, but it is very hard.


What a massive transformation, and a brilliant attitude you have. Thank you for sharing your story so far, look forward to hearing more about your progress!

Keep checking in and reach out whenever you need to :blush:

Thank you for sharing your story, it’s incredible and inspiring! Welcome here! :heart:

Well done Spencer, keep up the great work, glad things are turning around for you.

You got this- hold onto that thought how incredible this life is!!