* Checking in daily to help maintain focus

  1. Well this is exciting, A new thread :slight_smile:

Its fast approaching the end of my first year of sobriety. It’s coming really quickly! The last year has been nothing but work and focus. I’ve had a pretty empty plate, no doubt - staying sober and working hard have really been my main focuses. I definitely feel like I’m getting to a place where I can start putting new things on my plate :slight_smile: This was starters…now I’m ready for mains.

My parents have sold their houses and have bought one about 30 miles away from where we are now and as recovery has been so far so successful, I’ve decided to go with them for a bit until I figure out how to approach my next steps BUT before that…

…I’ve decided to quit my job :slight_smile:

I’ve worked pretty much non-stop for 11 months, regaining the skills and confidence I lost over the years due to alcohol and drug addiction.

… I’m taking September off!..

The move will happen on about 6/7 September, a week before I go on holiday. I’ve got plenty enough money saved and am able to support myself without a job and without having to worry about getting a new one right away

…I’m taking time out for me…

When I consider the time I’ve spent at my stove, the thousands upon thousands of dinners I’ve served this year, the hours Ive spent in chef whites and the missed family visits and my sister and sister in law both being pregnant right now, I feel I’ve earned the right to say ‘I deserve a break’

…I’m giving myself the time and energy I deserve…

Just to breathe. :slight_smile:

What a wonderful journey this is. :slight_smile:

30 Likes

Wow. So happy for you. Sounds like all of your focus and hard work has earned you this well deserved break. Good luck on your new adventures. :tulip:

Nah, that weren’t me. I don’t think, unless I logged on here a while back and forgot in the drunken haze!:thinking::joy:

1 Like

Checking in on Day 12. Ready to get this week going.

Have a strong day!!!

19 Likes

Yes Teej!!! I’ve been thinking about you, SO happy to see this post!!! :heart:

2 Likes

Continuing the discussion from Checking in daily to help maintain focus:

Day 26 and I thought things would start to get better or a bit easier…wishful thinking I guess!

Ah, @Joey1, not total wishful thinking. My experience is even sober there are tough days. Just how I respond to them changes.

The first month or two things inside were still leveling out. Lol, even today.

Hey, coming up on one month though, so good for you! Those days do get fewer and farther between each day sober. Sorry this was a rough one but hope you’re hanging in there! :v:

7 Likes

@Joey1, seconding @Eke here. It’s up and down for a while Im afraid. But being aware that this can happen is half the battle. At least when it does you just shrug and say
“oh well, it’s one of those days I see!”
Accept it and move on.

2 Likes

Day 3, I’m bored… may light something on fire. May do arts and crafts. May light arts and crafts on fire.

21 Likes

Hugs :hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs:

2 Likes

Takes a lot to come here and talk about this, Tristan. And dunno what to say.

I’ve been seeing a psychiatrist again the past several months after identifying with a lot of what I hear others saying (this share included), but with all the same concerns. A very close, normie family member’s life was also saved in part by a prescription.

It’s a tool. Maybe not to be taken lightly, but a tool that can save a life. Is life likely to slip into a malaise and drinking without it? Can I be very honest with my doctor and work out an appropriate plan? Can I continue to be accountable to them and maybe another no matter what? I can answer these for exactly no one but me.

My own doc has so far been offering alternative therapies (that remind me of my program, lol, including honestly meditating on the daily) stating on the outside all signs indicate its working. But we keep at it and keep checking in to see how it goes…

5 Likes

I was thinking of wood widdling by a fire then throw said wood into the fire, then making pudgy pies

1 Like

Thank you :slight_smile:

1 Like

Thank you for the support I got today. It helped. Seeing my friend’s 18 year old twins was heart-wrenching. For me personal it was good to be at the memorial. I didn’t get the chance to see her after she suffered a stroke. Her dying of heart failure last week prevented us ever meeting again. Cycling to the memorial through the village where she was born I thought I saw her walking and I half expected to see her standing in the doorway to welcome me to her own memorial.
But seeing her kids, her brothers, her parents, her and mine friends all gathered, and putting a flower on her casket made it real for me. Talking to her aunt helped who told me that terrible happenings like this should teach us to live life now and to the full. How right she is.
I’m still sad but I think I can move forward. And again I learned that whatever happens there is no need or use to try to numb the truth by stupid drinking or smoking. Life is much better lived sober. Love from Susanne and me in Broek in Waterland.

21 Likes

Menno, I am so very sorry for the loss of your friend. :tulip:

2 Likes

I have goosebumps. Glad you went. Hugs!

3 Likes

Your friend would be so proud of your strength.:blue_heart::blue_heart::blue_heart::blue_heart:

1 Like

zzko

14 Likes

Can you please just delete my account?

19 Likes

Good on you Pablo! The start is not easy but it is so worth it to be free of stupid smoking. Congrats on your decision and success!

2 Likes

I was diagnosed with ADHD back in middle school, and it never eased up. It sounds like your struggle with the symptoms is much the same as mine. I’ve come off meds a few times over the years for various reasons, usually trying to run from internalized stigma around stimulant medication, and it has always cost me. I spend the whole day fighting the symptoms you mentioned, and cringe when someone asks me “what did you do today” because honestly I was just fighting tooth and nail to get ultimately nothing done.

Like @Eke said, it’s one of the tools out there. Some people are able to relieve the symptom burden of ADHD to an acceptable level with non-pharmaceutical approaches. I have not really been able to do so over the years I’ve spent off meds. For me the issue was that the effect of the approaches I tried was small and limited to specific symptoms. There’s so much more to ADHD than just attention. There are plenty of people who do benefit a lot from non-pharmaceutical therapies, and it’s certainly worth exploring first, but it doesn’t always quite do the job in the end.

Because stimulants have been part of the addict brain for you in the past, it’s worth examining the expectations or hopes you might have for it. For example, even though it may relieve direct symptoms, it may not result in you being happier after all, or you may still not end up with the will to socially interact at the end of the day. Though based on past experience, these are extrapolations, which may make it harder for you to tell if you are simply hoping, or if part of you is chasing.

If it were me, I’d exhaust whatever non-stimulant options your doctor thinks reasonable before considering stimulants at all. You may end up with medication that works and just sidestep this whole issue.

Hmm, this is getting long and I may just PM you with the rest of my thoughts. Thanks for sharing!

7 Likes