# New sobriety and relearning to live
**URL:** https://talkingsober.com/t/new-sobriety-and-relearning-to-live/121678
**Category:** Emotional Support
**Tags:** messages, sober, alcohol, motivation
**Created:** [July 1, 2021, 4:08am UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/new-sobriety-and-relearning-to-live/121678 "2021-07-01T04:08:46Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 8
### Author:  [@Lilemm](https://talkingsober.com/u/Lilemm)
#### Post date: [July 17, 2021, 1:10pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/new-sobriety-and-relearning-to-live/121678/153 "2021-07-17T13:10:21Z")
Would just like to say I’ve seen you posting lots, I see the determination you have even on the hardest of days, staying accountable is the key. Well done sweet your doing so well.
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### Author:  [@Matt](https://talkingsober.com/u/Matt)
#### Post date: [July 17, 2021, 1:20pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/new-sobriety-and-relearning-to-live/121678/154 "2021-07-17T13:20:22Z")
> [@Hollz](#):
>
> enjoying dinner with me son
I’d say whether you enjoy the dinner with your son is entirely within your power. It could be at a restaurant, a kitchen table, or out in the woods. It could be sunny or rainy.
You are never powerless. You have the power to choose your attitude, no matter what happens to you. And you can choose to be present, and sober, always - _always_ - and that is your power and your choice.
Take care Hollz and never lose faith in yourself and your journey. You deserve a safe, sober life where you can be your full self 😇
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### Author:  [@Gotno](https://talkingsober.com/u/Gotno)
#### Post date: [July 17, 2021, 3:56pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/new-sobriety-and-relearning-to-live/121678/155 "2021-07-17T15:56:22Z")
Ok so you are maybe a little upset and annoyed that the dinner was moved to make it more of a “safe place” for you. Which took the focus of the day away from your son and his day to celebrate.
These are perfectly valid feelings to have and I have had similar feelings as well. This is the perfect opportunity to deal with your feelings in a positive manner.
First I look at why they did that. It is because they love you and want to protect you. You still have a right to be upset about it but you should feel pretty darn good about their intentions behind it.
I think now I would talk to them and explain that you appreciate that they love you and were trying to protect you, but it is not their responsibility to keep you sober. It is your responsbility to keep you sober. Also explain to them that you were disappointed that the focus of the night was taken from your son.
This does not mean that you will never want or need their help. But you would like them to refrain from assuming you need help and wait until you ask for help or support.
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### Author:  [@Hollz](https://talkingsober.com/u/Hollz)
#### Post date: [July 17, 2021, 5:08pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/new-sobriety-and-relearning-to-live/121678/156 "2021-07-17T17:08:33Z")
Thank you very much @Lilemm that really means more then you know
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### Author:  [@Hollz](https://talkingsober.com/u/Hollz)
#### Post date: [July 17, 2021, 5:09pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/new-sobriety-and-relearning-to-live/121678/157 "2021-07-17T17:09:56Z")
I had faith no one else did. It was poor holly we can’t go there they serve the alcohol she drank so let’s just go somewhere they don’t sell alcohol
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### Author:  [@Hollz](https://talkingsober.com/u/Hollz)
#### Post date: [July 17, 2021, 5:11pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/new-sobriety-and-relearning-to-live/121678/158 "2021-07-17T17:11:19Z")
Thank you. You completely got what I was saying and the feelings that were there
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### Author:  [@Matt](https://talkingsober.com/u/Matt)
#### Post date: [July 18, 2021, 12:10am UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/new-sobriety-and-relearning-to-live/121678/159 "2021-07-18T00:10:34Z")
That is hard and it sucks. It sounds like it felt like you were really treated like something to be maintained and managed, and not some_one_ who is together in life as an equal with the other people. That sucks 😕
Take care Hollz and keep it up, one day at a time. You can do this. Reach out, connect, communicate, and never give up 😇
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### Author:  [@franksmom0](https://talkingsober.com/u/franksmom0)
#### Post date: [July 18, 2021, 12:19am UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/new-sobriety-and-relearning-to-live/121678/160 "2021-07-18T00:19:33Z")
Glad you are reaching out. I am one year sober. It took about three months for me to make new schedules and habits that didn’t include drinking. I have only been to online meetings. I have a great therapist who has helped me allot. I included my doctor in the team. With that said, it is just one day at a time.
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### Author:  [@Hollz](https://talkingsober.com/u/Hollz)
#### Post date: [July 18, 2021, 12:21am UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/new-sobriety-and-relearning-to-live/121678/161 "2021-07-18T00:21:24Z")
Congratulations and I’m making it day by day just like everyone else is ❤❤
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### Author:  [@Gonefishin](https://talkingsober.com/u/Gonefishin)
#### Post date: [July 18, 2021, 12:26am UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/new-sobriety-and-relearning-to-live/121678/162 "2021-07-18T00:26:48Z")
Right there with you. Just rolling with the flow of life now. The good the bad and the ugly. Each day is a blessing though for sure.
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### Author:  [@1in8billion](https://talkingsober.com/u/1in8billion)
#### Post date: [July 18, 2021, 4:31am UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/new-sobriety-and-relearning-to-live/121678/163 "2021-07-18T04:31:02Z")
Hey @Hollz 🤗 how are you feeling today? You’re amongst the first people I connected with here on my journey to be honest 🙏❤ Just felt like saying hi and thanks for being here… 🙂
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### Author:  [@Hollz](https://talkingsober.com/u/Hollz)
#### Post date: [July 18, 2021, 10:20am UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/new-sobriety-and-relearning-to-live/121678/164 "2021-07-18T10:20:32Z")
@1in8billion still dealing with the pain issue, but I am slowly learning this new breathing meditation for pain and I really like it. It’s calming when my emotions are all over the place from my shoulder hurting. And thank you I’m glad you were able to like me, not many people could stand me a month ago lmao 🤣 I’m giving myself a star for that ⭐⭐. Hmm I’m likable today. Who would have thought right 🙂. Have a great day and I’m thinking about ya
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### Author:  [@Hollz](https://talkingsober.com/u/Hollz)
#### Post date: [July 18, 2021, 10:21am UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/new-sobriety-and-relearning-to-live/121678/165 "2021-07-18T10:21:43Z")
Well I’m up and at work have a great day everyone I hope to get something amazing to read when I get home today 🙂
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### Author:  [@Matt](https://talkingsober.com/u/Matt)
#### Post date: [July 18, 2021, 12:55pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/new-sobriety-and-relearning-to-live/121678/166 "2021-07-18T12:55:47Z")
> [@Hollz](#):
>
> I’m likable today
100% yes!
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### Author:  [@Hollz](https://talkingsober.com/u/Hollz)
#### Post date: [July 18, 2021, 2:17pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/new-sobriety-and-relearning-to-live/121678/167 "2021-07-18T14:17:49Z")
Awls 😁🙂😆 thank you @Matt lol
I Love Sesame Street lol 😆
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### Author:  [@Matt](https://talkingsober.com/u/Matt)
#### Post date: [July 18, 2021, 4:23pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/new-sobriety-and-relearning-to-live/121678/168 "2021-07-18T16:23:24Z")
Hi Hollz, thought of you (and many of us - this is common) and pain today, at my aunt’s house. We have a family friend who got into art as a way of processing his pain. He had formerly been prescribed opioid pain medication but didn’t feel comfortable using it - he was worried it was going to a dark place for him - and he began doing art as a way to keep his mind focused on something else. He has made some remarkable pieces, including this one:
I do colouring books myself - you can buy adult colouring books, they’re geometric patterns - and there are lots of good videos online as an introduction to sketching with pencils (I’ve done that too, it’s very soothing & focusing).
Best of luck Hollz. You can do this 😇
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### Author:  [@Hollz](https://talkingsober.com/u/Hollz)
#### Post date: [July 18, 2021, 5:09pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/new-sobriety-and-relearning-to-live/121678/169 "2021-07-18T17:09:49Z")
Thank you @Matt I truly appreciate you ❤❤❤
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### Author:  [@BSmooths27](https://talkingsober.com/u/BSmooths27)
#### Post date: [July 18, 2021, 10:05pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/new-sobriety-and-relearning-to-live/121678/170 "2021-07-18T22:05:05Z")
I would suggest surrounding yourself with people doing the same thing. I started going to NA meetings and I talk to my sponsor in a daily basis. I moved into sober living to be around the same people. Everyone’s situation is different so just keep your head up and keep updates on here. Im here to chat if you need it.
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### Author:  [@Hollz](https://talkingsober.com/u/Hollz)
#### Post date: [July 18, 2021, 10:29pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/new-sobriety-and-relearning-to-live/121678/171 "2021-07-18T22:29:22Z")
Thank you. And I have done a lot of changing in the last month
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### Author:  [@Hollz](https://talkingsober.com/u/Hollz)
#### Post date: [July 19, 2021, 1:36am UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/new-sobriety-and-relearning-to-live/121678/172 "2021-07-19T01:36:34Z")
I feel so happy and free. It’s amazing what 25 days can free. I went into the dark knowingly a very long time ago trying to heal a heart that was black and tired. I woke up today lightly seeing white, happy and with strength. beautiful in a magnificent new way and ready to take on an amazing new day 💛💛💛
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