Aww. Thanks. That’s alright.
Yeah, I’m really proud of myself. Yeah. I’m gonna email her in the morning and tell her I want to try to talk about it next week. We’ll see if I can lol. I’m gonna try.
Oh no. We’ve been dating for like 3 years, I think. But it’s long distance, so it’s really hard. But I love him so much.
I super will! ASL class has been so much fun so far! This week’s class got cancelled, but I have one in early August that’s making a bowl on a lathe. I’m stoked.
This isnt too bad for my first time shooting lol! The only ones outside the black are from when I moved it further.
Was that with a real gun it air pistol/rifle.
It sucks a bit that we aren’t allowed real guns here in the UK but it is a bit safer.
Saying that I’d probably be on a murder charge or two if they were allowed 
Hi @Kakimime1, I have been reading through your thread tonight and just wanted to say Wow! how proud I am of your achievements, you have inspired me so much! For a young lady who has been through much pain you have so much wisdom, strength and resilience, you’re amazing! Your self reflection is a really valuable tool, keep looking inward and giving yourself the self-love and self-care you deserve! Thank you for sharing your journey, your courage and strength has got me determined to delve into my own. Keep bringing the light. helping ourselves and helping others is always a really great way to heal our pain and well-being 
. Kindest regards to you my dear 
Yeah, .22 caliber.
It was fun. It was at a shooting range, so it’s more allowed than normal in my state. Cause we have really strict gun laws.
Haha lol
Thank you! That means so much. Thank you so much! It’s honestly amazing when people remind me how much I’ve changed. And when my crappy story can speak to someone, I think that’s just awesome!
Thank you! Also, I think I’m going to stealthag sign off lol 
.
Keep bringing the light!
I’m not doing too great. Been getting lots of chest pain, which I think is anxiety induced.
Been getting lots of anxiety. Lots of self harming thoughts, lots of suicidal thoughts. I wouldn’t do it, but I’ve been thinking of it a lot.
I should probably ask my psychiatrist to bring my dosage back up maybe.
Edit: sorry this became so long. I’m mad.
I’m so annoyed. My parents spent like 15 minutes telling me how I was wasting my time and berating me for not having done anything this summer. And saying how they want this summer to be how I want it and yeah. Whatever.
They keep saying they’re not being confrontational or accusatory, but guess what!??? If you have to say that, it’s cause you’re being friggin confrontational and accusatory.
Also they got mad at me thinking I was mad at them but I wasn’t. Then when I tried to explain that I wasn’t, they got mad that I was being rude, which pissed me off and made me mad. Anyways, now they’re mad at me and so they turned my wifi off, which is my only way to reach out to people and get help when I need it. So now I’m using data and I’m gonna be yelled at tomorrow for having used so much data. Cause I can’t freaking win.
How do they not understand that when I’m crying cause if them is when I need WiFi the most and thus that’s when it does the most damage and is most likely to make me want to hurt/ kill myself? But whatever. I just can’t be here. I’m just gonna go to the park or something every day and claim I was volunteering all day cause that’s what they want me to be doing. Plus then I’m away from them. Win-win.
Are there any not too expensive coffee shops that have free WiFi you could call in to.
I completely understand the communication misunderstandings I have had the exact same as you described with my dad almost all my life, it’s hard. Hugs 
Oh what a pain. Going to the park and getting some fresh air sounds like a great plan. And finding some WiFi in a coffee shop or something is maybe the way forward to avoid more arguments. Good call @anon13078412!
Is there any volunteering that you want to do, or is that just their idea?
I mean there’s one that’s really expensive, but if you buy like one thing you can sit there forever.
Ugh, yeah. Literally all I said was I’m not mad at you. And they thought I was sassing or whatever. Then I made the mistake of trying to convince them I wasn’t mad which they thought was really rude. Whatever.
Thanks!
Yeah. Yeah, for sure. I really hope it works. 
I have two. One just always happens to be at a time when it interferes with other things, so I can’t. The other requires standing and walking for 2 straight hours often while holding someone up. It’s labor intensive and I’m not sure I can trust my back with that yet.
I talked about my paper issues in group for the first time, which is cool. Also gonna continue to talk to my therapist about my sensory issues. I’mma try and think of other stuff that grosses me out like paper or that I have sensory problems with, like some strong smells. So yeah.
I just heard that anxiety can raise blood pressure. But I have massive amounts of anxiety and my blood pressures normal lol. Random thoughts.
Feeling lonely. Thinking about if I should bring an esa to college or not. We’ll see. Ah well.
Been noticing my legs and arms have started shaking again. Also been thinking about my sensory issues which isfun. But yeah. More random thoughts.
What’s an esa?
It’s great that you’ve felt able to open up about your sensory issues. Hopefully that is the starting point for working through some of them.
Do you know why you get the shakes?
Emotional support animal.
Yeah. It’s stressful too though lol. And a bit annoying cause we only have like an hour at a time.
And idk. It might be anxiety? I used to get it a lot and it subsided for a while. And it’s bad now. But idk. And it also happens a lot when I think of paper and stuff. Like my head shakes for that type. But yeah.
Feeling a wee bit lonely
Sorry to hear @Kakimime1, in times of loneliness, it’s often nice to use this time to do lovely, kind things for yourself : ) take your dog for a walk, get some cuddles from him, read a book, write in a journal, listen to a podcast, watch a funny movie, call a friend, write a list of 10 things you’re grateful for, clean & listen to music:notes: , bake a yummy cake (or anything you’d prefer). This feeling will pass, it’s a process of learning to love your own company and finding fun things to do 
