Next step in life

Does anyone feel tired from trying to stay sober? I’m exhausted by it now, I seem to be in a limbo state between a state of suspended life and real life.

I think I’m ready to start back at life now and give ‘living alongside alcohol’ a shot so I can try not to judge myself and other people close to me who drink.

Does this make any sense?

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Thank you.
I think I’m more than committed to being in the minority but I’m realising that there are certain aspects that are not benificial
For instance, family time - I just don’t spend time with the family now, football - I don’t go to matches, boxing - I haven’t been going to any fights.

Apart from anything, I’m now just a much better version of me so, the next step of intergrating myself back into social life May just well be to acknowledge my spirit is still with me, I’m still me. Life is to live.

Maybe try a meeting might help you with your struggles, today i can mix with drinkers and go to places if its required without thinking of booze my life is great i just dont drink i do everything else like normal people i have a program and a network around me to help with any problems i encounter ,in early sobriety its best to stay away from any were there is booze till you get strong enough wish you well

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I think the more interesting thing about getting back to normal is not the alcohol in the presence of my loved ones, but my sobriety in their presence. I can’t always voice my opinion, but my sobriety may help someone who I don’t even know is watching that is an alcoholic learn that it’s possible to exist. A passive way to pay it forward. The longer I’m sober the longer I realize my addiction was not for me. You got this.

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I hope the comedy show was good anyway :sunglasses:

I get this. Especially in early days it can be jarring because the things that used to occupy time are no longer activities we feel comfortable with, because of their association with our addiction.

“Suspended life” is an interesting term. I think you hit the nail on the head. If I’m understanding you right, it’s that you’ve stopped doing certain things which for you are associated with your addiction - you’ve suspended those things - but you haven’t replaced them with new things. So it feels tiring, it feels like “missing out”, because you’re not growing something new, you’re just suspending something old and unhelpful.

You mentioned missing family time and time at fights. Are there ways you can interact with family without booze? It’s even possible to ask for a short visit without booze. It’s ok to ask for things from people :innocent:

As far as fights, is there a way you can find safe activities for you? If your seeing fighting habit is closely connected with booze, can you change it? Watch them on TV with some sober friends. Make some friends at AA or SMART Recovery and watch it with them.

Or maybe explore new activities, new interests. It’s a whole new world now that your eyes are open and clear :innocent:

Take care and remember: it’s ok to feel off, it’s ok to feel strange. It passes. You’re walking a new path, a new adventure - you’re growing :raised_hands: :innocent:

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I’m still at the stage of getting used to long stints where I don’t break my abstinence.

Mixing with others who aren’t sober seems a long way from where I am. I have to shield myself from the whole ‘buzz’ of that environment.

It’s an interesting position you’re in.

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It took me some time to find my footing in the world as a sober person. When your life revolves around alcohol, as most of ours has, it is challenging to learn how to be, feel, do, engage without it. For myself, I knew exactly how each celebration, interaction, event, day, evening, etc would go if I drank…what I did not know was how it would go if I remained sober. Learning how to attend events, chat with family, celebrate, relax, etc…doing it all sober became an exciting exploration…as opposed to a dreaded slog. What was I gaining versus what I was giving up (aka hangovers, shame, anxiety, guilt, etc).

It wasn’t easy or direct or even pleasant at times. But learning to be your self without alcohol is a blessing and a gift.

There is zero to discover about who I am drinking. But even now, years sober, there is more to experience, discover, uncover. Another gift of sobriety. :heart:

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Get more patients, fully concentrate on my new jobs (on education - maybe having a master’s degree on it drags me to it haha), live with my old man 'till I can earn enough to be on my own and face the world without the need of a fucking sip every hour.

Get my dog Jake back - he’s living in a farm.

Then in the long term maybe quit smoking.

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I felt this 100%. Not so much now but when I had 3 yrs clean I was tired of recovery and trying to stay clean everyday. It was sooo exhausting. I ended up going back out bcuz I thot I could live along side alcohol and certain drugs. Well let me tell u… 13 years later I have 1 month clean as of today. No matter how long we have in recovery, the fact that we can not have just 1 stays the same. As soon I put any form of drug or alcohol into my system, that demon of addiction roared its ugly head. I fell hard after 3 yrs of clean time (in fact worse). Almost like I didn’t have 3 yrs clean :frowning: plz really rethink this.
Recovery is supposed to include a sense of joy and freedom. Its hard work yes… but its not supposed to be white knuckling it either.
Is there anything uv been wanting to try? A new hobby or sport, some art or activity? Maybe rediscover something about you that sparks ur passion!
We are on a journey of self-discovery.
U know where addiction leads… it doesn’t change and it always gets worse. Stay on the path of recovery and doors open up and miracles happen! :smiley:

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