This may seem like the weirdest addiction. But yes, it is an addiction nonetheless.
I am hooked to reading novels/online stories on sites like Wattpad, Inkitt, Movellas etc. I literally search and scour the internet to look for new fiction novels to read.
The catch here, is not just reading fiction. It’s WHAT KIND OF FICTION.
Romance is a compulsory.
In addition, there has to be paranormal elements to it like vampires, werewolves, mermen, shape shifters, cyborgs, newly created creatures.
And above all, the ones with a broken hero/heroine. Beastly, Addicted, Ruthless, Dangerous, Deaf, Dumb, Scarred, Disfigured, Paralysed characters who find love at the end of the novel.
And this’ not just binge reading.
I sit for hours and hours together on sites like wattpad, inkitt; comb through goodreads and apps like AnyBooks to read. Pages and pages.
And here comes another problem. When I feel like masturbating, I quickly get to the part where graphic sex is described. I even especially look up erotica titles for this purpose.
And as strange as it may seem, it interferes with my daily life-
Lying on bed for hours like a vegetable and reading.
Studying for just maybe 25 to 30 min a day. Then compulsively falling back into the trap of more reading.
Stepping over ward days (I’m a medical student), telling myself I can’t go to class or wards because of cold (or any such illness). Then instead of studying or taking care of myself, falling back into the book reading autopilot.
Its cost me my 12th grade marks.
This has been continuing from 2009.
I did keep myself away from it by not owning a smart for a year when I had been preparing for medical school entrance exams & another year i.e 1st year of med school.
But then I fell back again.
It gives me a certain kind of high. Its my escape from what I don’t know.
Med school stress maybe?
But I wonder if it’s really the stress? Because I just don’t take any stress. I read and read. And when the exams come, I cram up and then I am like done. I sail through. Sometimes I wish I failed just to get that big hit. But I can’t affor that now. Its 4th year of med school and soon I will have to apply for my residency.
It’s so difficult being in this autopilot.
Does anyone here have this addiction?
They say reading ia good. But trust me when it gets this way, it certainly isn’t. The compulsiom to complete the book is so high.
I have tried app blocking apps. But it takes great effort to activate them after a period of abstinence. I fall back a 1000 times more after abstinence.
Moreover, I always find ways to get around website blockers… like deleting/removing them.
If any of you can relate to this please feel free to reply or start your own readinv addiction posts.