One word on how you feel today

It’s ok. She just keeps thinking I’m dissing her every time I try to tell her how I feel or what she can do to help and then she’s like why don’t you talk to me, why can’t you tell me how to help you? And I was sad and tried to give her a hug to help feel better and she just stood there and asked why I was hugging her. I told her I was sad and she started talking about how I hurt her feelings by saying I don’t want to tell her every little thing about my life. Hugs aren’t bad. I just don’t feel like I deserve it if my own mother won’t even hug me. Sorry for the rant. I’m just still really upset.

Almost everyone deserves a hug. Sounds like your mom was in her feelings as to why she didn’t hug you. And that doesn’t mean you don’t deserve to be hugged. Sometimes we don’t get what we want from people and it hurts, especially when it’s family because we hope/expect that they’d treat us better than outsiders,so to speak. And honestly I think they should. I also know with us addicts we can do a good job of pushing people away and hurting them,so as with every coin,there are two sides. Still think you could get a hug. Hope you can meet with your friend soon.

Idk. We’ll see. Just need a hug man. My mom doesn’t know I still did it till three weeks ago. She thinks I stopped a year ago. And she doesn’t know about the assault. And it sucks. Anyways, thank you. I talked on the phone with my friend for a bit which kinda helped some. He’s really nice and I love him. I feel a little better. Now all I have to do is try to eat something and maybe my headache will go away. Thank you for your support. You’ve really helped. Thank you so much.

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Like crap.

Mindful. I’m conscious of my sobriety, why this is the path for me, what it took to get here, all the trials and tribulations, the anger, the immense sadness I felt such a short time ago. All of it can be returned, King Alcohol would gladly refund all the misery I missed out on if I were to take that first drink. I’m aware of all the sick and suffering, and the impact I can have on them with a few simple words, a glance, a hug. It’s never to late to do the right thing, ever. I don’t worry about tomorrow, it’ll happen whether I want it too or not but I don’t have to drink because of it. Staying in the present, the right here right now, is the only place for me to be so that I may live, by His Grace.

Happy Friday everyone, May the Fourth be with you.

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Oh yeah? I sense a story… Do share…

Calm.
Sitting on my balcony surrounded by the sounds of nature (and some playing kids) :heart::blossom:

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Distracted :unamused:

peaceful and grateful

Crappy.
I’ve got the flu (11 days so far).
My wife’s got 40 people coming for a party today… oh the joy!:stuck_out_tongue_winking_eye:
I suppose I should be grateful… at least I haven’t got a hangover as well☺.
Have a good and sober weekend everybody!

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Oh boy 11 days? Get well soon!

man, I’m in a hurricane of emotion. I’ve been so overwhelmed this week, but its finally over… so I guess that I am CATHARTIC

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Worthless
I feel like I’m a bother. I feel like my issues don’t matter. I feel like I don’t deserve the help I have cause I’m not even using it well. I feel stupid for not actually trying to talk. And like all my beliefs are being like crushed. Idk what to believe in. Idk what to do. Who to tell. I’m just lost and I feel like my life is so messed up and it’s all my fault which it obviously isn’t, but… And I have one friend I can talk to and I feel like I stress him out and he doesn’t want to talk to me. I just feel like crap. Plus I ate like 1,000 Calories today. Idk. today’s just not been good. I know it’ll feel better, it’s just hard to like actually believe it rn.

I feel that man!

I have stepped foot on all but 1 continent. I have never met a person that was worthless. Talking is something every human being takes for granted, yet when we need to talk about what is going on inside us, it is almost an impossibility. Once upon a time I was a a young man, seems forever ago. I was on a 15 mile march. I couldn’t go any further, and I was given a piece of wisdom. Left foot forward, then your right foot forward and repeat. You dont have to run, but one step forward at a time will get you where you want to go. I have carried that thru my life. Inside you is an amazing person. Every day, just move that one foot forward.

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Ill try. Thank you. I’m trying to just focus on what I can do to fill my time. I’m practicing ukulele and cooking and idk. We’ll see. Trying to find other things too cause I really need to stop relying on people so much.

Hesitant…

Emotional. Visit with the kids went well, wish I could redo a couple parts. I got frustrated, if it wasn’t 1 who was unhappy it was another. I was still present and working through it. After the visit I watched a draft special about Baker Mayfield and a little angel who had leukemia. She fought, went into remission, it came back and claimed her last year. I’ve been truly blessed to have such healthy and happy kids. For the longest time it was all about me, so self centered and just going through the motions of life and fatherhood. As I watched the special, the tears flowed and renewed my gratitude. This life has afforded me more than it should have, now I have to repay it and embrace it. Never take anything for granted, keep working on the me I want to be.

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I know it’s hard to. But please don’t feel this way. WE ARE HERE FOR YOU. and u no problem to us. If you ever need a chat or to unload personal message me. I’m here for you whenever you need it. I know whats it like to feel as you do. As I’ve been there. I will help you in anyway I can. You are not alone. All you need is that one person that can help and support you. I will be that person and so could everyone that’s on this forum. If you want me or us to be.
Hope things pick up for you soon. And things will pick up for you. Try and remain positive.

You are never alone!!!

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Thank you. Ill try to remember this. That literally made me cry. Thank you. I’m feeling slightly less bad now lol