The last two nights I’ve woken up in the middle of the night and start to freak out about the weirdest stuff. Today was I kept thinking i have something wring with my brain cuz I keep having these small headaches throughout the day and I felt more tired than usual. The weird thing is I just woke up and immediately started panicking and heart stats racing and can’t go back to bed for hours. I havnt slept more than 3 hours at a time without waking up randomly in about a week.
Idk, this anxiety is fucking crippling lately. It hasn’t been this bad since I was withdrawaling from booz…
Hi Steve, I’m sorry to hear you’re going through that buddy. I’m with Jenna about going to check this our with optometrists, doctors, psychologists (it seems like a lot of work to book the appointments but it’s worth it).
Also keep involved in the self-work & group-work of recovery. Having someone to talk to, having a place to keep track and keep accountable and moving forward together - that makes a big difference at least with not feeling discouraged.
Do you snore Steve? I know it seems a bit odd to ask, but if you do snore and it develops into apnoea/apnea your airways will be obstructed and you’ll wake up with your heart pounding for no apparent reason. That could trigger anxiety/panic attacks. Other symptoms are lack of sleep and being tired throughout the day.
Anything new in your life? Or big events coming up? Are you hitting a big birthday soon? Are people in your life moving away or are they having any big changes themselves?
The only time I really get big panic attacks is when I’m not being 100% honest with myself and maybe making compromises in my head about what’s “ok” for me to be doing. I used to ignore these signs by drinking. Now they literally only show up when I’m not being 100% true to myself consistently. So I’m forced to take inventory of my daily life and really be honest with my actions.
recently id had a lot of insecurity and fear in my head which i resisted thoroughly examining/ opening up about, and i think it was fucking me up a lot more than i knew. i experienced some lingering headaches and trouble falling asleep myself. i had ruminating thoughts and just overall very high strung compared to how i generally feel these days. after opening up about it and giving it some attention my physical state improved so i believe it was related. and emotionally i felt a great deal more at ease w things once itd been addressed.
also maybe caffine? i say this cause i saw something you mentioned in another thread about coffee. could be the caffine but cant hurt to examine the mind too.
I agree with the sleep apnea suggestion. When I was freaking out during the start of my withdrawal I felt as though my CPAP machine was the only reason I was still alive. I always felt as though I couldn’t breath my anxiety was so high. I didn’t come to terms that it is just anxiety until recently as I never thought I was one that couldn’t control my state of mind. I fell you when you say you feel like your mind has a loose wire. I felt the same! Sleep is a healer man, I think you should talk to your doctor about getting a prescription to chill you out, if only to take at night. I had to do this and my nights were always the worst! Anxiety came out of nowhere.
My counselor told me to look into Baoding Balls. You’ve probably seen them before. About 1.5"-2" spheres that you rotate around on one hand. The science behind it is that it occupies your frontal cortex of the brain, the same place that instructs us to freak out! I bought a few sets and I can’t say it solved my panic, but I really think they help me relax a little. I’m still on the starting side of this, but I use them in the car sometimes and always at night when my panic seems to be stronger before I take my prescription before bed. Worth I shot I thought.
I think this is what is ultimately causing your panic attacks. You’re experiencing some physical symptoms that you’re unsure about and it’s creating anxiety in your mind. The not knowing part is turning into false stories you’re telling yourself. I think the only thing that will ease your mind is setting up an appointment with your primary care physician, get some blood work done and then come up with a game plan for getting your health on track.
I don’t know if this happens to you, but it’s possible to feel anxiety about feeling anxiety, if you can believe it lol! I would notice that I was feeling fine and then the thoughts would start. Why do I feel fine? Do I really feel fine? Wait a minute something must be wrong. No joke. I had to learn some grounding exercises to talk my way out of it and they helped.
Yeah, I think it is sometimes called anticipatory anxiety, but I could be wrong. We expect to be anxious because it is our normal and its a normal we have to unlearn/get treated for. I am so so glad you got an appointment. If you tell us when it is I’ll bug you and remind you to go!
It takes time. It suuuuuuucks - it definitely does suck - but it will pass.
One mental trick that helps me when I’m feeling off / awful / etc etc, is to think: enjoy the struggle. (I learned this from a friend who when I said I hated being sick & having to ask for time off. He said: Enjoy the fever.)
The feeling of being sick, or dehydrated, or headache, or worried (like a hamster running!), or any of the million other struggles of life - these are all parts of life, just as important as the moments we enjoy like sunny days, feelings of peace, etc.
Life’s a whole package. It’s ok - it’s good actually - to feel off. It will pass in time (just like sunny days will also pass in time): in the meantime, be present in it. Headache? Drink water; communicate with your colleagues “Dan I’m not feeling so well I need to rest a bit” etc. Tired? Nap. Follow your body’s signals.
You’re developing a relationship with the most important human in your life: your sober self. He’s a good guy and he’s worth knowing. Take the time to have a healthy relationship with him and you’ll be grateful
One trick I use to get out of the hamster running thoughts in my head is the “5-4-3-2-1” grounding trick - I list:
5 things I can see
4 things I can feel
3 things I can hear
2 things I can smell
1 thing I can taste
That helps me get back to the present moment so I can take my life one thing at a time (usually what drowns me is those thoughts of trying to be everything all at once; I need to get back to the ground and remember no matter how much I think I’m “supposed” to be doing, life is always just one thing at a time). Sometimes that means I need a snack and a nap. Sometimes it means I can do another work task. Sometimes it means a walk. Whatever it is - it’s something I see by being grounded and listening to my body and my sober self.
I’ve been experiencing this as well off and on after 4 and a 1/2months of being sober. It totally sucks. I’ve been dealing with some other issues just at home and I am pretty sure that is what is triggering my anxiety and panic attacks and anxiousness. If I can fix or at least make strides to making those stressors better, I’m sure the other things will get better somewhat. Which actually, yesterday made some small progress and slept better at least a bit and not feeling SO shifty today.
I hope you get to feeling better. It just sucks to be sober and still having symptoms mimicking hangovers. It’s just so wrong!
Life is not easy and feeling helpless happens. I get these feeling when bored and they compound until i feel very stressed out, suppose thats why i drank so much in the past.
It will pass so try not to dwell on it
about going to check this our with optometrists, doctors, psychologists (it seems like a lot of work to book the appointments but it’s worth it).
