# Phone anxiety - Can anyone relate?
**URL:** https://talkingsober.com/t/phone-anxiety-can-anyone-relate/210658
**Category:** Life in Recovery
**Created:** [September 27, 2026, 7:49pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/phone-anxiety-can-anyone-relate/210658 "2026-09-27T19:49:55Z")
**Posts on this page:** 7
**Page:** 2
### Author:  [@erntedank](https://talkingsober.com/u/erntedank)
#### Post date: [September 30, 2026, 6:46am UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/phone-anxiety-can-anyone-relate/210658/21 "2026-09-30T06:46:58Z")
I’m so grateful for this thread!
It encouraged me to call and make some necessary appointments yesterday 🙏
Knowing we share that issue and I am not alone helps me 🙏
Thank you @Merryshoes for this thread and all who shared 🙏🙏🙏🙏
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### Author:  [@Olivia](https://talkingsober.com/u/Olivia)
#### Post date: [September 30, 2026, 6:42pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/phone-anxiety-can-anyone-relate/210658/22 "2026-09-30T18:42:33Z")
Hey! I could count myself in in this lovely company 😊 I don’t have anxiety over _all_ calls, just in certain situations. I write things down too, like @erntedank . It helps me to stay focused. I sometimes sit down and ask myself questions, like why are you anxious about this call. What do you think will happen? The answers are usually something like:
- I don’t want to call the doctor because I don’t want to go see them! I don’t want to know the test results. I don’t want to have that procedure. I’m afraid of the outcome.
- My request will inconvenience them. I’m afraid they will reject me and won’t help.
- I’m afraid I’ll be misunderstood and make a fool of myself.
- I’m afraid of the news they have. Are they going to dump their pain on me and cause me to lose my stability too (co-dependency)?
- I’m afraid I might call a wrong number and make a fool of myself.
- I simply don’t know _who_ will pick up the phone. The fear of the unknown.
- I don’t want to call because I am struggling and don’t want to open up. Don’t want to explain. I’m ashamed.
- I don’t want to call because I haven’t kept in touch. I’m ashamed.
Often I make up scenarios in my head that don’t have any foothold in reality. I can also project my anxiety if something else onto the act of calling. I isolate when life is hard. If I call a friend and don’t share, I feel I’m faking a connection (I know that not everyone needs to know my business). If I’m honest, it’s scary because I have to verbalise my struggle and it becomes reality in a way that feels final - I don’t want to make it final!!
When a certain person calls me, I’m always afraid to pick up. They usually call when something bad has happened in the family, and it will mess me up.
There’s also the fact that there is zero body language available when you call. It’s such a huge part of all communication, so when it’s missing, it can be hard to navigate a conversation.
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### Author:  [@WilliamBloke](https://talkingsober.com/u/WilliamBloke)
#### Post date: [October 1, 2026, 2:46am UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/phone-anxiety-can-anyone-relate/210658/23 "2026-10-01T02:46:00Z")
I inherently HATE the telephone…pure and simple. Phone calls to me feel like an intrusion. I know some people who make me feel held hostage when they call me because they won’t let me go! They totally ignore my cues that I’m tired of talking and want to hang up. Thank God for texting. I wish that technology was around about 30 years ago.
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### Author:  [@Merryshoes](https://talkingsober.com/u/Merryshoes)
#### Post date: [October 1, 2026, 6:16am UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/phone-anxiety-can-anyone-relate/210658/24 "2026-10-01T06:16:41Z")
@Olivia That list! It’s as though you were in my head! I know too well all those feelings, all those scenarios in my head, all those what-ifs… When the reality is often that you make the call, things are communicated, connection is established and everything is fine afterwards, probably actually better than it was before (events get communicated, stuff gets done, health is checked, friends and family are happy to reconnect).
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### Author:  [@LimePuddin1](https://talkingsober.com/u/LimePuddin1)
#### Post date: [October 11, 2026, 3:58am UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/phone-anxiety-can-anyone-relate/210658/25 "2026-10-11T03:58:45Z")
I’m self employed and I need every phone call from customers, unknown calls, to go to voicemail. This was I can listen to the call and grasp the tone. This puts me ‘in control’. 99% of the time it’s not a complaint or issue. Yet I still panic when the phone rings
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### Author:  [@Merryshoes](https://talkingsober.com/u/Merryshoes)
#### Post date: [October 11, 2026, 11:16am UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/phone-anxiety-can-anyone-relate/210658/26 "2026-10-11T11:16:45Z")
My car broke down this week. I mean, apparently it can still go, but it’s beeping all the self-destruction alarms, so I am not driving it to the mechanic. I need a tow. Dealing with this has needed two calls to insurance and another two to the mechanic, trying to get days and times aligned. I was stressing over all of it, but making those calls has meant getting my car repair sorted. And it helped to remember that the whole thing is a big deal for me, but they are used to dealing with similar, and even more complex situations.
So, phone calls made, car on the mend.
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### Author:  [@Starlight14](https://talkingsober.com/u/Starlight14)
#### Post date: [October 11, 2026, 12:38pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/phone-anxiety-can-anyone-relate/210658/27 "2026-10-11T12:38:09Z")
Good on you Merry! Youre absolutely right, its a necessary evil isnt it, i hate car stuff too i think mostly because i have no idea what im talking about when it comes to cars and i fear being viewed as the silly little woman who hasnt a clue or worse still being taken advantage of moneywise, im glad youve done the shitty phone calls and really hope your back on the road soon xx
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