Thank you very much for the very timely reminder! I didn’t drink, day 5. I kept busy. I worked, visisted my mother and my aunt. I then did some crocheting and every time a drink seemed like a good idea I had either coffee or tea. Did I enjoy them? Not as much as I would have hoped 
did it help? YES! I have to stay sober. I have no choice, I can’t live my life that way anymore. I refuse to be mess any longer. Thank you again @Bobbyw! You’re awesome 
have a wonderful weekend 
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Hello Soli!
I am sorry to hear of the struggles you have been experiencing… Here is what I was told when I relapsed. Though the clock does start over for us… That time you had before clean does NOT go away. Meaning you didn’t lose it, it exists because you were strong enough to go through it. Recovery and being sober is not easy. I do not care what anyone says… for an addict, it is nearly impossible without help.
The first piece of advice I would give is to be kind to yourself more than you are… I know that it is difficult to accept, but we can’t change what has happened. All we can control is how we react to the situation that we created.
Another thing I would do, at least until you are able to handle it, is avoid going to the parties… You have to do weighing of the pros and cons… And ask yourself is it worth your sobriety?
good luck and know I am with you. Just reach out and I will do all I can to help you.
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Going for a sober weekend is great 
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Hello Wes!
It’s very kind of you to say all of that! Thank you very much for the insight and for your valuable advice. I do agree that I’m a bit hard on myself. I will avoid every single party until I’ve figured out why I relapsed and why I’ve become so dependent on a poison that I know will slowly kill me. Last time, after I’d successfully stayed sober for a few months I stopped working on it thinking it would just continue on its own. I was wrong to think that way. I’ve learned this time that I can’t afford to do that now. I have to remain mindful. It seems overwhelming but I have this community and wonderful people like you who help remind me why I need to stay on this path. Thank you again! Virtual sunshine and flowers for you: 
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Hi @erntedank 
I hope you’re well and happy. Sober weekends ARE the best!! I’ve bought some embroidery tools to work on a new “distraction project” for this weekend. If it turns out looking good, I’ll share it on one of the threads I saw around here somewhere, you know the one where people share their art? People share some amazing stuff over there! I thought it was a good idea to keep myself occupied. Anyway, have a beautiful and sober weekend, and thanks 
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