I had 5 days and was feeling great and optimistic.
Havent gone 5 days without alcohol in God knows how long. Coworkers planned a last min happy hour and everyone was talking about it all day. I was going to go but not drink. Got caught up in the moment and one glass of wine turned into like 10 beers and 2 shots. Blacked out for hours.
This is where it gets scary. Somehow took an uber home, she dropped me off in front of my house, but somehow I couldnt find it and proceeded to wander around for hours trying to find my house. Was so drunk didnt think to use Google maps. I dont even remember the first hour. I just came out if it wandering some random street. Fell down a few times. Finally I thought to call another uber and got home 2 and a half hours after I was initially dropped off.
I was stupid to go to the bar thinking I’d be fine. I’m lucky nothing happened to me. I couldn’t have been hurt or killed or robbed or kidnapped or God knows what else.
Had a heart to heart with my husband this morning and told him I NEED his support on this and for him to stop telling me I’m not an alcoholic. I absolutely am.
I am thinking about talking to my sisters today too. I am tired of trying to do this on my own.
I have one question.
What are you willing to do to find recovery?
I am thinking about this. I am ready to openly admit to people that alcohol is a problem for me. Not that they’ll be surprised.
I am open to trying meetings as well. I have no one who can relate to me.
I plan on talking with my husband more in depth once the kids are in bed tonight.
I looked up some local meetings in my area this morning. I’ve never been to one but I am open to it.
I think that’s a great idea
Be honest with your sister 100%
I’m absolutely done. I’ve been praying and crying on and off this morning. Something has shifted. This is the worst thing i’ve done in a looong time.
I keep thinking of what could have happened and hate that I’m missing a full block of time.
I know I dont need the validation but I need my husband on my side for support. He doesnt think I have a problem, clearly I do .
How I realized I was an alcoholic was that I was having the same horrible experiences every time I drank. Very similar to your experience. I guarantee you that if you keep drinking, no matter in what kind of setting, the negative results will be the same. However, if you have the honest desire to stop drinking and begin the journey of recovery, I guarantee the results will be amazing. Keep your head up. Sobriety is an absolute better way of life.
Awe man sorry to hear about this. I have about 100 similar stories about myself… and I also have kids at home- scary stuff. My work also does happy hours, and last week I told my staff that I don’t drink. It was sort of interesting the responses I got. I could tell some people felt awkward, but I’m confident enough at this point that I don’t care about others feelings of disappointment at my sobriety. If you do hit up a meeting keep us all posted as to how it went!! Make this your rock bottom and don’t look back- you will be so much happier 
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I have kids too which makes this 10x worse. My husband and I chatted more today and I think he finally understands why I drink. He really just thought I liked wine a LOT.
That was my rock bottom, i feel pretty confident in that. I took a long walk along the lake this afternoon and thought and prayed a lot. Can only go up from here!