Still Here
Frustrating start to the day
Much more chillaxed now.
Just went for a nice walk
Hopefully be fine enough to play tennis later.
Thankful for sober time and don’t want a slip or relapse.
Still vaping to the Max.
Don’t need Marijuana, I’m dopey enough without it.
Don’t need codeine, turmeric with black pepper is doing the job with regular exercise.
Don’t need coffee any more, just kidding. Two a day keeps the headache away.
Don’t need the booze. Feeling the frustration is much better than feeling drunk. Mostly peaceful feelings. Not hungry not angry not lonely, I have moments because I live alone in my van. I’ve met some amazing people in the last six months of van life though and I do generally like my own company most of the time. Might be a bit tired but not so tired that I think alcohol will help.
Thanks to my friends in recovery here and thanks be to Jesus Christ for your patience, mercy and Grace. There’s been a few close calls over the years. I’ve had a noose around my neck back in 97. You’ve got me through depressing times, suicidal and homicidal ideations. There was the time I was working on a farm and a piece of corrugated iron flew off the back of a Ute. I ducked and would have been decapitated if I didn’t. There was the time I was riding my bike over a bridge and got sucked towards a passing truck. Somehow survived that. There’s all the times I drank enough to cause alcohol poisoning and all the times I took way more pills than I should have yet I’m still here to write about it. There’s all the things going on with geoengineering pharmakea and the Georgia guidestones but my time is not up until God says so. Teach me to number my days, I’ve wasted so many being wasted. EisE stands for enough is enough Dev. Lead me not unto temptation but deliver me from evil. With the temptation you will always provide a way of ESCAPE.
Gotta stay on track.
I feel like I know less now than I did a year ago. I think that’s a good thing.
Here’s proof that daily maintenance adds up.
Never, Ever did I think this was possible.
Me 2
What an amazing journey.
Unlearning so much
Double digits! 